Lesley is still hanging on, fighting hard and fed up! She cannot believe that she “did it again”, as she puts it, and has messed up her recovery. She is definitely down today. Nose hair is old news - I took some other printouts with me, and she enjoyed them, but they didn’t have the same effect! She did appreciate the kind offers of hair / full fleeces etc, though!
Normally she is so positive that I hate to see her like this, although I think it is inevitable. She has fought so hard and refused to give up again and again, only to be let down by, I quote, her “stupid heart”. I keep reminding her that she can still use her hands: that ability has not abandoned her, and that other ability will return slowly, and she is very good, but has had enough. She has not yet moved her legs at all independently and although we don’t mention it I know that is very much on her mind. She refers to herself as “devonplodder” at the moment, which I find heartbreaking.
Please help me find things to make devondancer laugh again! You have been so magnificent, I know something will come up!
Thank you again for your help, care and encouragement.
And Jerry - that’s just what she needs! And she loves the insights into the lives of her friends on the board, most of which are so different from our own, and yet we share so many interests. Typical nurse: always nosy!
Bodily functions are fine, whoever suggested them in an earlier thread! As I said, she is a nurse, and knows more about bodily functions than she cares to, some days.
What a great thread it was. Some of you actually went to the effort of putting down real punch lines. I think the beauty is that anything can be a punch line if you don’t tell the joke.
For example: The bartender said, “anything can be a punchline if you don’t tell a joke.”
There was one I saw on the “Overheard in Dublin” website - which is worth a look.
This fella in the pub has a new mobile phone, which he is showing to his cronies. They are admiring it when it rings. He answers it, with some surprise. It is his wife.
“How did you know I was here?” he asks, and then wonders why his mates are all laughing.
So Tori Spelling walks into a bar. Bartender says, “why the long face?”
What was Pink Floyd and Dale Earnhardt’s greatest hit? The Wall!
(I apologize to any nascar fans out there in Chiffland)
Here’s a joke that doesn’t work without verbal interperetation:
What does it sound like when a brown cow and a brown chicken are making love? “Brown-chicken-brown-cow!” (think 70’s funk/porn music and the “bow-chika-bow-wow”…get it?)
That’s all I got for now…that’s appropriate in mixed company anyways.
Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, “It’s getting pretty hot in here.” The second muffin turns to the first and says, “HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!”
THE SECOND GREATEST JOKE EVER TOLD:
So this drunk walks out of a bar and sees a nun down an alleyway across the street. He goes over to her, and he pushes her. He just pushes this nun, and she falls. So he starts kicking her. He’s just kicking this nun, and she’s screaming. This goes on, and finally he stops, and he looks down at her, and he’s breathing heavy, and he says, “What do you think NOW, Batman?”
So.. ye remember me kid sister, Mary? She married Tommy Fitzgerald… yeah… that’s the one.
Well, anyways, seems Tommy’s brother’s gone and taken up wit another man to live… yeah… yeah… I know what yer thinkin’… an ye may jest be right… but me… I’m thinking this could just be a match made in heaven… ye know? … Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick…
