Like WOW man! Can you believe my luck?

Poststructural Pub
1

A few people here are aware that I write books. At present, one is
even being “looked at” by a genuine name-brand publisher, FWIW.
A few other people know that I’ve also “published” an earlier book via
the print-on-demand service, XLibris. And it is that book, The Legend
of Logjam, with which I will now make my fortune…and all because
of what came in today’s mail!
Have a look! What unbelievable luck! At first I was wondering how I might come up with the modest fee (see end of letter,) but then I realized
Silly me! I’ve got that great deal going with Prince DuBong, the rightful
heir to the throne of Lower Ureyekyew, who was deposed in the recent coup d’etat of which I’m sure you’ve all heard. He’s promised me a nice little chunk of change for helping him get his fortunes out of the grasp of the evil Lord Bedbug, and once that comes through–what’s 7.9K??

And just lookit what they’re gonna do with the $!
Cinemagic in W. Hollywood CA!
10 Brick and Mortar bookstores! I bet they’re big’uns too!
A tv commercial that will air in at least one market (It might even be the Superbowl–yeah! I bet it is!)
What amazing luck that I am in this select group of authors!

2

I had no idea that “brick-and-mortar” meant retail!

Take out a second (or third, as the case may be) mortgage. Or sell your kids. But DO it. :laughing:

3

Did they really mean literally brick-and-mortar? What if the establishment is made from wood? Or cinder blocks? I was thinking that was figurative or something. But then again, I thought that emm was serious at first when I read through it :stuck_out_tongue:

disclaimer: I’m running on about 3 hours of sleep today, which is why I seem to look as if I’m losing it :wink:

4

Obviously it couldn’t be a legitimate retail business, then. <Amazon.com> is of course a fraud, for example. What a revelation! To think that I have been buying books from the shadier peddlers all this time…

5

Emm,
Do you really want your address there for everyone to see :astonished:

Slan,
D.

PS. I’ve already copied it :wink:

6

Let’s all send Em letters offering to distribute her book in return for a wad o’ cash. :smiling_imp:

7

Oh cool…I really wanted to order pizza tonight for dinner. Now I can! :party:

8

Done!

9

fine. I’ll scratch the address. even though it was just my witness protection program address.

10

It’s a sad reflection of the times we live in but better safe than sorry.

Slan,
D. :wink:

11

There. It’s adulterated. If however, because I was slow in more ways than one, Dub shows up on my doorstep, I’ll consider that an unintended benefit.

12

Better yet, let’s all send letters to Airleaf Publishing with offers to sell their business in exchange for a wad o’ cash. :smiling_imp:

13

Well with such a vast distance for me to travel, Nano will probably get there first.

Slan,
D. :cry:

14

Yes, can you imagine her disappointment? :laughing:

15

No Nano, we could have lots of fun finishing each other’s sentences while we wait for Dub’s pontoon bike to dock. Meanwhile, I’m expecting Izzy to bring pizza (you promised, didn’t you Izz?)

16

Pizza? I’m in. Hmmm. What have you got to drink around there, anyway? (just practicing being “The Thing that Wouldn’t Go Away”) :wink:

17

I suggest you send them a cashier’s check from a third party, for $10,000, and ask them to take out their sum and wire the remainder on to you.

18

Great idea. I’ll ask them if they will. Noting that my wealth is oh-so-real, but sadly tied up in a third world political fiasco.

19

Why don’t you tell them you are on a Church Mission in Isreal and have your agent in the US pick up the $10,000 check? Make sure you use improper grammar!

20

Have any friends in the OSBI?