…but sometimes you just can’t help yourself.
Slan,
D. 
mental note to self: do NOT call husband “Steve”
These are great, Dub 
I’ll admit to having a bit of trouble with the vernacular in some of those examples, but I did like the one where the American lady points out that we don’t let blind people drive.
Covering the options
Bus Driver: “No mineral, plant or animal may be smoked on our buses for the good of our customers health.”
–Announced on the 78a bus
It is so good to know that Dubliners do not allow the smoking of animals on their buses.
Now that you mention it,I can see certain problems with the vernacular but I’m available for translations should any be required.
Slan,
D.
Someone might have tried to smoke horse.
Motherly love
Mother to crying toddler at supermarker: “If you don’t stop crying I’ll sell you on ebay!”
I loved that one too
All of them, please? Thanks.
Very funny! Thanks for posting that. Still chuckling.
This HAS to be made up:
Three Americans crossing road on Dame Street. Automated Speaker on Traffic lights announces: “The traffic on Dame street has been signaled to stop.”
American woman asks the Irish guy crossing also: “What was that about?”
Irish guy explains: “It’s a new prototype light for the blind instead of the beeping lights.”
Three americans disuss this while crossing and upon reaching the other side the american woman turns to the irish guy and says: “You know in america we don’t allow blind people to drive.”
I’ve been reading this every once in a while:
http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/
it’s a pretty darn funny, specially if you add accents in your head.
Not necessarily. She might have been having fun at the Irishman’s expense, although that would certainly be an about-face from the normal run of things.
Hmmmm…most of those sound exactly like the conversations I have around the house with my five year old…and just as intelligible…
Robin
Although these people HAD to be from Boston! 
Yanks…
Two americans and an Irish girl on the red line luas, near Red cow roundabout.
American #1 says to Irish girl : “So when does this luas go to St.Stephens green?”
Irish girl : “Um… this is the RED line. You need to get the green line luas.”
American #2 : “Oh gee, ok great. So is that like on the otherside of the tracks?”
Irish girl : “No. It’s a totally different line. You CAN’T get it here. It’s a different area.”
Amercan #1: “Oh great, thank you so much. We’ll wait and get the next one to Stephens green so.”
–On the red line LUAS
In defense of Americans who SEEM stupid…a lot of the time we just can’t understand what Irish people are saying because of the accent!
I liked the New York site…I started laughing really loudly in the library while I was reading it!
J.
I just can’t understand that New York accent..
Slan,
D.
Yeah, how come there’s no “crazy Irish people” stories on the New York site?
J.
We’ve seen dem Woody Allan films..dere all crazy over dere..so we all go te Canada..Australia or anywhere dat ye don’t get run over when ye get laid back like.
Slan,
D.
I always liked the Virginia Blue Blood accent. Nearly indecipherable. The trick is not do move your lips or enunciate or pronounce the letter “R”. It’s a difficult accent to write phoenetically.
Speaking of vernacular, what’s a “knacker”?
I can probably deduce what it is but I’d like some clarification…