Dale, here’s what you need to get done:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/78294/nbc-today-show-teen-sues-for-tattoo-gone-wrong
Looks like a job for a “fix-it-up chappie” named Sylvester McMonkey McBean.
Can you actually believe that she fell asleep while getting tattooed on her freakin’’ FACE??
Passed out, maybe, but asleep-- no.
My thought exactly.
Starry, starry night…
A face without stars is like a night without freckles. …or something… 
She lied, to save face I suppose.
I don’t think tattoos ought to be legal until 21 and I also wonder if a mandatory waiting period wouldn’t be a good idea.
she might have had a little help fallin asleep 
“I asked for 56 stars and initially adored them,” Vlaminck told a Dutch TV crew. “But when my father saw them, he was furious. So I said I fell asleep and that the (he) had made a mistake.”
There’s a long and colourful history of tattoos as surprise! morning after hangover enhancers.
The tattoo artist is, himself, apparently a stand-up guy. Not surprising at all.
Yer man Rouslan Toumaniantz, tattoo artiste:
Quoting him: ‘I don’t regret it. To tell you the truth, this has given me some publicity.’
Yep…I think he’s all good to go for that.
They look like African animals.
They look like silly humans.
An alternative source for the story since the original link is USA only.
How does he eat? 
Yes, the question occurred to me too. Then I thought, Hmm. More like, what can he eat? Crackers seem problematic, for example. Super-messy, surely, with all that hardware.
He IS kinda thin.