Never take a sleeping pill and a laxative at the same time.
Voice of experience?
I don’t even want to imagine such a situation…darn I just did…gross to say the least!
MarkB
Thankfully no! I heard this pearl of wisdom this evening and felt that I should share it with the world.
I’m off to bed now, without taking any medication!
Never feed your dog chocolate. It will die.
No, I don’t speak from experience…it just seems that a lot of people don’t know this.
One man’s fish is another man’s poisson.
Steve
Oh, jeez. 
L’Zubvika, much? 
(Isn’t it strange how, even after he has been gone–what over a year?–that I still connect Zubvika and French? The Weekenders must’ve done it to me with the constant "Froooonch"ing.)
Don’t spit into the wind.
Never trust a fart after Fifty.
Never waste an erection, even if you’re on your own.
Oops…not my idea…I heard Billy Connolly saying that.. 
Steve
Or it will at least get very sick. And it could certainly die.
Chocolate is rich in a caffeine-like compound called theobromine.
It does all kinds of nice things in the human body: it’s a smooth muscle relaxor, a mood elevator, and a mild euphoric.
A dog can’t metabolise it the same way a human can. To them it is a hallucinogenic poison.
So eat the chocolate yourself–better for you and your dog. 
–James
Steve, I’ve occasionally been accused of baiting folks to try to “get their goat,” so to speak.
But at best, I’m an amatuer baiter.
I believe what you are referencing requires a master.
–James
Mmmm! I feel mellow just thinking about it . . .
For you theobromine aficionados, tea has a good bit, as well, and coffee has a little (coffee has more caffeine and theophylline).
Probably best not to feed those to your pets, either.
Well, I’m only a toddler of twenty, but I might have a few pearls to share over the years:
Do not eat playground gravel. It has to come out.
If you know someone who whines a lot, take special care to avoid them when they are pregnant.
While we may commend a child for having the “creativity” to color outside the lines, they usually only do it because they don’t have the sense of vision, or the proper tequnique to fill the shape given (said by a veteran line-colorer-outsider. This rings true of my scriblings on so many levels).
Do not cut your own hair.
On music: If you develop a good sense of phrasing, you will never need to worry about technique. Unfortuantly for us slackers, a good deal of tech development is goes into good phrasing. Darn.
A woman who cooks cabbage and peas in the same pot is highly unsanitary. (attributed to Confucius)
Well, if a smelly dame offered me a pot of peas and cabbage, there’s more than one reason I’d decline.
Try reading it out loud.
Nyuk. Sometimes you hafta explain 'em. I didn’t get it either…
Confucius did not speak English.