When I was young I longed for wrinkles,
Now I’m old I long for more.
If only I was young again,
then I’d have some spare space
for some more wrinkles.
(Edited to say: the knife of life cuts our souls into living time after time - the joy)
Oooh, I just remembered all the church retreat weekend songs!
i.e.
FIVE CONSTIPATED MEN
There were five, five, constipated men
In the Bible, in the Bible
There five, five, constipated men
In the five books of Moses
The first, first, constipated man
Was Cain, he wasn’t Abel
The first, first, constipated man
Was Cain, he wasn’t Abel
CHORUS
The second, second constipated man
Was Balaam, he couldn’t move his ass
The second, second constipated man
Was Balaam, he couldn’t move his ass
CHORUS
The third, third, constipated man
Was Moses, he took two tablets
The third, third, constipated man
Was Moses, he took two tablets
CHORUS
The fourth, fourth, constipated man
Was Solomon, he sat for forty years
The fourth, fourth, constipated man
Was Solomon, he sat for forty years
CHORUS
The fifth, fifth constipated man
Was Samson, he brought the house down
The fifth, fifth constipated man
Was Samson, he brought the house down
CHORUS
A lot of the pranks practiced where I lived were dangerous. There was a climbable tree with a limb that stretched out over a road. Someone would climb out on the limb with a burlap bag filled with leaves or shredded newspaper. When a car came along the climber would scream and throw the bag down in front of the car. I was too young to do this and anyway I couldn’t climb trees very well. I was in a car my dad was driving when one of the guys did this to us. It was quite alarming but I told my dad what had happened. The police came at least once and some of the kids were caught.
Another trick was to get some dog poop (mushy if possible) and put it in a paper bag. Go to a house where you know someone is home. Set the bag on fire and ring the doorbell. Run away fast and watch from hiding place. Chances are that the person who comes out and try to stamp the fire out.
Suzy had a steamboat, the steamboat had a bell,
Suzie went to heaven, the steamboat went to
Hello operator, give me number nine
If you can not find it, I’ll kick your fat
Behind the elevator, there was a piece of glass
Suzie slipped upon it, and broke her little
Ask me no more questions, tell me no more lies
Boys are in the bathroom, zipping up their
Flies are in the city, bees are in the park
Boys and girls are having fun necking in the dark dark dark.
Also, we used to improvise on the theme of that same tune (must be) as rebl posted… I can’t remember exactly how it went, but it was an army-related thing.
Also,
Hitler
Had only one big ball
Goring had two but they were small
Himmler
Had something sim’lar
But poor old Goebbels
Had no balls
At alllllll
And there was one about panties. Hmmmmmm… They’re all coming back to me now… Watch out!
Any minute now we’ll get The Good Ship Venus.
But not from me. 
There were a whole range of Miss Suzie ones. They were the sort that you do while clapping hands with a partner in intricate patterns. The one Fiddler posted is one. Another (to the same tune) is:
Miss Suzy had a baby
She named it Tiny Tim
She put him in the bathtub to see if he could swim.
He drank up all the water,
he ate up all the soap;
he tried to eat the bathtub but it wouldn’t go down his throat!
Miss Suzy called the doctor,
the doctor called the nurse.
The nurse called the lady with the alligator purse.
“Measles” said the doctor,
“Mumps” said the nurse
“Nothing” said the lady with the alligator purse.
…I’m sure there’s more to that one but I don’t remember it.
And there was this hand-clapping one:
Miss Mary Mac, Mac, Mac
All dressed in black, black, black
with silver buttons, buttons, buttons
all down her back, back, back
She asked her mother, mother, mother
For 50 cents, cents, cents.
To see the elephants, elephants, elephants
Jump over the fence, fence, fence.
They jumped so high, high, high
They reached the sky, sky, sky
They never came back, back, back
Till the 4th of July, July, July.
This one was for chanting while skipping rope, no melody:
Cinderella, dressed in yella
Went upstairs to kiss her fella
She made a mistake and kissed a snake!
How many doctors did it take?
1, 2, 3 (keep counting skips until a miss)
There was an old farmer who lived on the rocks
He taught all his children to play with their
Toys and their playthings while out on the moor
There came a young lady, she looked like a
Proper young lady, she walked like a duck
She said she’d invented a new way to
Educate children to read and to write;
While the sons of the farmer were shovelling
Hay from the hayfield and muck from the byre
And the dirty old farmer was
…Having his cup of tea.
call and response:
Flee!
Flee!
Flee fly
Flee fly
Flee fly flow!
Flee fly flow!
Vista
Vista
Cumala, cumala, cumala Vista.
Cumala, cumala, cumala Vista.
Oh, no, no, no, no da Vista
Oh, no, no, no, no da Vista
Eeny-meeny-desimeeny, Eww-wa-adda-adda-meeny hex-i-meen-y-zalla-meeny-Eww-wa-adda-ah
Eeny-meeny-desimeeny, Eww-wa-adda-adda-meeny hex-i-meen-y-zalla-meeny-Eww-wa-adda-ah
Be billy oten doten bo, bo baditen doten. Shhhhhhhh!Shhhhhhhh!Shhhhhhhh!Shhhhhhhh!
Be billy oten doten bo, bo baditen doten. Shhhhhhhh!Shhhhhhhh!Shhhhhhhh!Shhhhhhhh!
That reminds me of this one, which must have been carried down to my generation from WWII:
Whistle while you work
Hitler is a jerk
Mussolini pulled his peenie
Now it doesn’t work!