This alone should be reason enough to study up on manners I would think. 
No, I simply made the mistake of believing Cranberry was genuinely seeking advice. Not a mistake I’ll be making again.
I’m sorry. I wasn’t seeking advice on table manners (especially from such a proper Brit 
), just the “why?” of it because, to be honest, there being a “wrong” way to cut eggplant seems a little bit insane to me. hugs
I am with you 100% on this one, mate. When I go out to eat I’m not going to waste time pushing my ever-cooling food around politely with whatever is deemed by the fun police to be the correct utensils. I shall eat quickly and lustily, and anyone who does the same gets my appreciation. Anyone who doesn’t gets their grub eaten by me. Don’t talk with your mouth full. Don’t masticate loudly and juicily. Try not to slop stuff around everywhere (I usually fail on this one). Don’t take more than your share until you’re sure it’s spare. Don’t sit there discussing the bloody food all night. These are the only rules that matter. All others are rather sad bullshit. 
Steve
Steve, we are on the same plane of enlightened gustatory excellence. Surely the sun shines out of our arses.
djm
I said masticate.
Steve
It sure feels that way when I’ve had a king prawn vindaloo the night before. 
Steve
Oh, geez, we LUVS a good curry. We’re definitely on the same plane. Too bad about the man boobs - oops! 
djm
Just when I thought we were getting friendly!
Steve
I honestly don’t think Lamby (or I) is pushing weird extremes of manners. The manners you mention here sound fine for most places. You are aware of not grossing out your companions. Some people might have somewhat different manners, but the main point is not to act like a pig. So it doesn’t sound like you do. Eating quickly and lustily, well, I’d have to see that to see if it is the same as shoveling it in. But no one is advocating taking teeny bites and mincing about generally. There are situations in which probably the stranger rules might be relevant—but one can usually, as you and djm and I do, avoid going to those sorts of things. If I had to go to something fancy for a good cause, I would try to behave in a more lady-like way for the sake of the cause.
Dear Ann Landers,
I am extremely grossed out when someone with red hair, someone from Mississippiana, someone with a nose bigger than an egg, someone who eats cereal for dinner, or, worse yet, someone who is known to play recorder, sits down beside me to eat. Whatever shall I do?
Lovingly yours,
Table-manners Degerate
You could start by learning to spell ‘degenerate.’
But how will that help with those nasty recorder players?
It won’t. But you’ve got to start somewhere.
Cynth is correct. Neither of us are advocating extreme or “refined” behavior. We’re both well within the realm of just plain decent table manners.
If you cannot separate a bite of food from the whole portion without sawing, pressing, scraping the whole thing back and forth, or otherwise exerting more than a minimum amount of force, then you need to use a knife.
If you are going to use a fork, you use the side of the tines. You do not stab the points in and twist. If you cannot cut the food with the side of the tines, it is too difficult to cut, so you use a knife. But, do not use a knife to cut anything which is able to be cut with a fork.
So, let’s look at a scenario. You’re having dinner with a nice family. They serve eggplant parmigiana. It’s very good, and you like it, but the eggplant might have been a large, tough one, and the skin isn’t exactly tender, so it’s difficult to cut cleanly with the fork. You start sawing and scraping and hacking at it with your fork.
Your hostess is going to be mortified, because your sawing and scraping and chopping tells her that her dish isn’t the best.
All you see in “manners” is that they are arbitrary, high-fallutin’ ways of being snobbish, so you think it’s just fine to saw and scrape. After all, you think people should think well of you no matter what your background and personal habits.
But it isn’t about YOU at all. It’s about YOUR HOSTESS and HER feelings.
Your sawing and hacking, whether you intended it or not, showed her that her meal was not as good as she would have wanted it to be. It showed her that the eggplant was too tough. You broadcast the fact to everyone with your overblown display of sawing and hacking. YOU COMPLAINED ABOUT THE FOOD. You didn’t just use the wrong implement . . . you criticized your hostess.
And what happens when your sawing and hacking causes sauce to spill on her tablecloth? That’s a stain that will never come out and it got there unnecessarily.
Now, it’s expected that a dish might be a little too tough to cut with a fork, but if that is the case, you avoid broadcasting that fact to everyone–just use a more appropriate implement, the knife, to cut neat bites. You can use a knife to cut eggplant even if it is tender, so using a knife if it is tough isn’t inappropriate at all. It’s expected, in fact.
Manners are never about YOU. They’re about other people and their feelings. Considerate people put the feelings and needs of others before their own. They cut their food with a knife, when necessary, and avoid making a spectacle that might embarrass others.
Actually, I am now wondering if you didn’t just stab the whole thing and hoist it up to gnaw a piece off.
Well, how else does one eat a thrice-baked eggplant?
Urggh!
I did just notice that Cran’s friend advocated cutting the food with the knife in his left hand. That would only be if he were left-handed.
No matter what style you use, you hold the knife in your usual knife-wielding hand. If you did not use your dominant hand, you wouldn’t be able to eat.
Assuming right-handedness, American style has you cut with the knife in the right while holding the portion of food steady with the fork in the left, tines down. Place the knife on the upper right edge of the plate, blade in. Transfer your fork to your right hand, then pick up the piece you just cut off, tines UP.
If you are using Continental style, you cut with the knife in the right, but stuck tines down in the bite you are cutting. You then transfer the bite to your mouth with the fork in your left hand, still tines down. I believe you put the knife down, but I’m not clear on where to put it. On the outside edge of the place? Or on the table with the tip resting on the edge? At any rate, you cannot clutch the knife in your fist while resting your elbow on the table.
Is slurping your soup ok?
Mukade
Only in Japan.
Excellent!
The soup tastes better, and you never burn your tongue.
Mukade