-
Whether to attempt a visit to The Gambia, where daughter #2 will be spending her Spring semester abroad, starting mid-January.
My thoughts run a little bit similarly to those of someone who’d have to consider traveling with small children, though the 2 males for whom I am responsible are neither one very small. So, you just sort of wonder if it’s worth the hassle, but, otoh, I can’t not-live forever. And they tend to do what I ask, apart from interacting with the world in a slightly off-kilter manner. So, I’m at least getting a Lonely Planet guidebook so I can explore the possibility. -
Where to begin college visits (for one of the males mentioned in item #1.) I’m leaning increasingly in the direction of one of the places which offers a specific program for LD students who need extra hand-holding, butt-nudging, monitoring. This may push the search into a wider geographic range than I had in mind (and…do they offer Japanese? Does it matter?) but that may be for the best. I do believe that people need to, at some point, sink or swim, but that doesn’t mean you should push them off the boat just anywhere or into just any body of water.
There are several small schools in the NYC vicinity on my radar.
Oh, man… travel whenever you get the chance. It’s one of the most broadening things you can do for yourself and those two males. In the US we get a VERY skewed idea about the rest of the world and traveling to other countries really puts things into perspective.
We took a trip to China back in Nov, and it looks like we’ll be going to India next summer for our daughter’s wedding. Can’t wait!
Just looked up The Gambia (yes folks, THE Gambia, which I never knew) in Wikipedia and it looks like a great place to visit. Go!
-
Cut the apron strings, Ma.
-
Give 'em each a copy of Self Reliance by Emerson.
-
“Ride due west as the sun sets; turn left at the Rocky Mountains” (fr. Jeremiah Johnson)
#3 works well…as I used to live in Annapolis.
on #2 -
We’re going through our own version of that currently. Son #2 has the intelligence to “be” whatever he wants. Unfortunately, he doesn’t have the drive, motivation, or common sense to do such.
We’ve pretty well decided that he’ll be going to either community college or nursing school. He just would never survive a large university - especially at the get go. Perhaps if he gets some college under his belt he’ll be better equiped to go farther, but I don’t think so. School to this stage has been a constant struggle.
I just want him to be self sufficient and happy.
I’d go just to see the Pied Crows, who star in all those windex commericals.
The one is 61 years old, and the apron strings are firmly welded I’m afraid. In his case the object is to do things while he’s still capable.
And he is still, though one cannot predict the trajectory of future cognitive impairment due to his neuro disorder.
The other is 16 (how 'bout that palindromic coincidence?) and completely lacks for common sense and practical skills, but has
future potential. I would have a long flight on which to force him to acquire some knowledge of world geography, so there is a chance for edification. I have been told by one of his school founders that LD children of his ilk do grow up. It just takes them longer.
I explain this not as an excuse to fuss, but simply to clarify why the prospect of these 2 as travel-abroad companions might give me at least a bit of pause.
Now, if it were any of the 3 girl children who I were considering as traveling companions, the choice would not be daunting. They are fully capable of sharing the challenge and managing themselves without getting lost. And they do. I’ve sent the first to Panama twice, the second is off to West Africa as I said, and the third shows interest in study abroad in the UK or Australia in the near future. I write checks and wave goodbye, in general.
So, it’s more a matter of revving myself up and overcoming any inhibitions purely on my own internal spunk and determination without the emotional buttressing you might derive from travel companions who could carry some of the weight.
That’s kind of the point of it.
But doing nothing really never makes one feel better, so it’s better to absorb guts and fiber from the atmosphere and do things if one can.
Exactly that. Animes on the PC all day is not an acceptable future.
I’m afraid of what would happen if mine were a nurse. No no.
Beyond that, I don’t really care what he does for work, as long as he does it. I’m kind of viewing 4 years of college as 4 more stepping stones on the path to the maturity he needs to grow the sense needed to take on life.
emm, more schools are trying to cater to folks with disabilities. you should check to see what accomodations are being made at the schools of your choice.
I will offer no advice to raising children other than to ask how your basement is equipped to be turned into an apartment.
I think I might have shared this before -
But son #1 decided at age 12 to be an air craft mechanic, and went through high school with that goal in mind.
When someone asked son #2 if he was like his brother and “knew what he wanted to be when he grew up” - he stated he was going to be one of those kids that at age 50 live in their parents’ basement and plays video games and calls into talk radio all day… 
yeah, ya might have 
I don’t suppose he’s changed his mind yet…
have ya come up with a good contingency plan?
emm,
- oh, duh! sounds a bit like an African Hong Kong…there has to be some form of daycare available there, or a nanny, tour guide, shepard
- maybe the Navy or Air Force…he will get older, they will feed him, he will be fairly safe
at this point he has been in an academic environment most of his life…maybe a change will help
Mine was to periodically borrow five bucks for gas money with a promise to pay them back when I got my pay check,
wonder out loud which utility bill really needs to be paid before the utility company cuts off service,
leave big piles of clipped discount coupons sitting on the kitchen table (actually use them if the kids come shopping with me,
and talk a lot about the retirement community with subsidized housing I was planning to move into when I finally became an empty nester.
It doesn’t matter if you’re rolling in money, the kids have to think they get only once chance and there’s no flunking out & moving back home.
Both my kids keep a room at their house for me just in case my husband dies. That’s the way the Gods intended it to be.
Great, if you’re Gollum and like dank caves.
No. He must leave. Somewhere. Or I must move to somewhere where he can have separate living quarters.
He is too stubborn and eccentric for the military.
my parents tried downsizing their living accommodations
every time my sister moved out
by the time she was in mid 30s
they were in a single wide
I think she only moved home once after that
good luck 
Maybe that’s the real reason so many seniors live in trailer parks: no room for the kids to move back home.
djm
we just kept moving farther for the shopping malls, cities, etc.
Wasn’t The Gambia featured in one of the Man Vs Wild episodes some time back?