there was once two cats from Calkenny,
who thought there one cat too many,
they scratched and they bit,
they fought and they fit,
'till insted of two cats, there wern’t any.
Said a boy to his teacher one day,
“Wright has not written ‘rite’ right, I say!”
And the teacher replied
As the error she spied,
“Right! Wright, write ‘rite’ right, right away!”
A tooter who tooted a flute
Tried to tutor two young tooters to toot.
Said the two to the tutor,
“Is it harder to toot
Or to tutor two tooters to toot?”
(You owe me one, VB. Now your thread is actually on topic."
Best wishes,
Jerry
There once was a cute whistler named Em
Who, corrected by fellow whistlers said, “Damn,
I hate to be wrong
And my English is strong
I never err! And I will prove it to they!”
Said Em to a whistler named Bloo,
Your meter is slightly askew.
But if, as you say,
“Em” and “damn” rhyme with “they,”
I’ll give credit where credit is due.
A kumquat once fell from a tree
and knocked out poor Michael McGee.
When later he woke,
He exclaimed, “What a joke!
I’ve be-kumquat unlucky you see.”
(one of my originals)
I happen to have a large cat
Who rests by the door on a mat
I lost my chapeau
and “Alas”, plus, “Oh no!”
found hat squished twixt the mat and the cat.
So my meter is slightly askew?
Well, dear Em, let me ask you:
Regarding my poem
You throw the first stone
Is that something you ought to do?
My name is Gaelic … and this Limerick came from a Trinity College
‘Rag Mag’ circa 1979 so that qualifies my reply as having some Irish content.
Right?
There was a young sailor names Bates
Who danced the Fandango on skates
But a fall on his cutlass
Rendered him nutless
And practically useless on dates
Cailean
There once was a writer named Erin
Who could’nt write lymrics for sh*t
She tried and she tried
But never improved
And finally gave up.
Geez Bloo, I’m surprised that you thought
That that thing was a stone, it was not.
It was merely a piffle,
A trifle, a whiffle,
So don’t get your pants in a knot!
When I heard the lone call of the whistle,
It led me to pen this epistle–
Here I sit, forum-lurking
When God knows, should be working–
But instead write and risk my dismistle.
M
I once met a man from Nantucket,
and let’s jst say the rumors about him are GREATLY exaggerated.
-H. Simpson
;)[/i]
Only if you are a nun!
Mistle=Prayer Book
She need be no such of a thing… she just might be an epistlealien… and they don’t have nuns, not one.
There was an old sod, name of Murphy,
Whose whistling was terribly scurfy.
But at length and at last
He finally passed
And Murphy, the sod, became turfy.
Ouch.
FROM
they fought and they fit,
TO
they fought and they SPit,
Glad I looked. I really like poems and stories where cats come out on the short end!!!
From what I gather, the two cats in question were really one cat, one being a regular cat, and one being an exact duplicat of the first cat, except made from anti matter. In other words, an anti-cat.
It has to do something with Einstien’s Specific theory of Relativity. (not his better known theory of General Relativity.)
In a nutshell, if the can (and anti-cat) in question were of sufficient mass, time (and space) would not only be warped around it, but actually be dragged around the cat, although most likely to a very very small degree. Thus, without being able to change the direction of a very large object indeed (such as a planet or very very large cat) one must conclude that if time travel is possible, it must follow the one-way only laws, called Terminator laws. One must conclude that Back-to-the-Future rules (two way) are theoretically impossible.
This has historically been the debate of time travel through the years. Whether we follow Back to the Future laws or Terminator laws.
Anyway, this is what I pieced together from reading the back of sugar packs at Stucky’s. I think they got most of thier information from that wheelchair guy.
Dr. Strangelove?!?
No that real smart guy who makes up all those theories about the cosmos and stuff and has the talking keyboard. I think he may be the boss of the X men too, but I’m not sure about that.