ZURICH, Switzerland - What began as a routine training exercise almost ended in an embarrassing diplomatic incident after a company of Swiss soldiers got lost at night and marched into neighboring Liechtenstein.
According to Swiss daily Blick, the 170 infantry soldiers wandered just over a mile across an unmarked border into the tiny principality early Thursday before realizing their mistake and turning back.
A spokesman for the Swiss army confirmed the story but said that there were unlikely to be any serious repercussions for the mistaken invasion.
“We’ve spoken to the authorities in Liechtenstein and it’s not a problem,” Daniel Reist told The Associated Press.
Officials in Liechtenstein also played down the incident.
Interior ministry spokesman Markus Amman said nobody in Liechtenstein had even noticed the soldiers, who were carrying assault rifles but no ammunition. “It’s not like they stormed over here with attack helicopters or something,” he said.
Liechtenstein, which has about 34,000 inhabitants and is slightly smaller than Washington DC, doesn’t have an army.
Maybe I’m outdated, but the last I heard Liechtenstein uses the Swiss Franc as currency, relies on the Swiss for military protection, shares economy with the Swiss, and all that jazz. It just seems kinda stubborn to say “We’re an independent country,” because, really, they’re not.
And besides, two thirds of the people in Liechtenstein are Swiss, German, or Austrian. It just seems kinda ridiculous…
The news article is a cover up for what was actually a far more insidious plot to destroy Lichtenstein’s fledgling ice cream industry. What really happened was that a desparate commando squadron of the Red Brigade attempted to blow up the new factory where Lichtenstein’s team of none chief flavour experts were concocting a new ice cream flavour so revolutionary, so irresistable, so cunningly crafted as to be almost addictive that it was feared (in certain circles which must remain unnamed here) that Lichtenstein might actually threaten the stability of the EU and the world order. Unfortunately, the dynamite got wet during the hazardous crossing (it seems the factory compound was surrounded with a moat filled with armed ducks). In a last chance desparate move the Red Brigade squadron attempted to eat the only batch of ice cream with the new flavouring, after which they intended to kill the team of nine flavour experts, when suddenly - a troop of lost Swiss soldiers burst into the room, ate all the ice cream, and promptly threw up all over the Red Brigade, who fainted in disgust, thus rescuing the team of flavour experts. What the news story should really have been titled was:
