I am beginning to get to the recording stage with my current tune, and would appreciate criticism (preferably constructive) from folk here.
Any and all observations welcome. If you want to criticise, go ahead. Don’t feel the need to soften it iit is easier to write and read if it is blunt. And I have a very thick skin.
Thanks in advance.
On the whole, I like it. 
I don’t know the tune. What is it? It’s funny, but it sounds Native American to me. A strange tune indeed.
Now to some specifics - well, one actually. And then maybe another … 
Those dips at the end of the last notes of phrases - where you let the pitch drop away. Personally, I never like them whoever’s playing them, but that’s a style thing and a matter of personal taste. However, if you’re going to do them, I would suggest that they will sound much better, not only to me but to people who actually like those sorts of things, if you hold onto the note itself much longer and only let the pitch dip away right at the end of the note (but before you run out of breath).
There are a few places where you swell the volume in the middle of the note. Sometimes, it seems to work, but at others, it … um … doesn’t. I’m really struggling to explain why though. If it were me, I’d just listen again, identify where those places are and change them.
Your phrasing has come on in leaps and bounds. It’s lovely. I could pick you up in just one or two places where you snatch a note or allow yourself to run low on breath, but seriously they would be tiny, picky criticisms.
Overall, I think you’re going great guns on these slow airs, Phill. Really impressive progress.
Moi aussi. 
I don’t know the tune.
Me neither, so can’t really comment on timing etc.
Those dips at the end of the last notes of phrases - where you let the pitch drop away.
But I listened to it earlier and tend to agree with Ben here (perhaps just a few too many of these, although you could doubtless say the same about my upward slides!).
Also thinking you’re occasionally pushing the notes too hard, with the first octave A (and maybe B) most vulnerable to sharpness. But it’s really pretty stylish and controlled playing with a great low whistle sound (which instrument is this?) and I doubt you’ll get much ‘blunt’ criticism here!
I think the clue may be in the file name - is it Ailein Duinn?
Add me to the list of those who are greatly impressed with your progress! This playing shows not only much improved technique,but LOTS of careful listening. Style on what is essentially instrumental Sean Nos is highly individual, and I like what you have done. To my ears the pitch bending (and not just at the end of phrases) seems well thought out and very musical. I like the end drops and did not feel you were just running out of breath. Along the way there were some phrases with swells as already mentioned which did not always seem to work, but often when a similar passage came along and the same technique was applied it did work. Go figgur..
All in all I’d be delighted if my slow air playing was always as free, flexible, and well thought out as yours was here.
Congrats!
Chuck Boody
Impressive. Agree with the dying away notes thing, although a lot of people use it. But on the whole you have great control of your instrument and your phrasing is excellent - some of the most articulate playing I’ve heard on this forum. A real performance.
Just a couple of points: your tempo is a little rigid, imo. A lengthy solo like this can benefit from not only rubato, but tempo changes to give it some variety. And there’s a repeated thirds motif that you could definitely play with some rubato and maybe slur to staccato that sounds very mechanical. Finally, you might consider bending some of the long held notes by shading. And! a bit of tonguing variety wouldn’t do any harm. For instance, you can use a very hard tonguing to activate the high partials at the start of a note, giving a sort of shakuhachi-like chiff. But these are matters of personal style.
Very well and enjoyably played. I think you can take it a higher level if you work hard on your tonguing and, especially, tempo.
But - I would be the first to admit that I know nothing about “trad” style.
Any chance of getting the score or ABC of this?
Thanks folks you said many nice things and I always find that encouraging. There were also some constructive and helpful criticism for which I am very grateful. Let me address some points in no particular order…
The tune is Ailein Duinn as Hoopy ‘sherlock’ Mike points out. I was mostly influenced by the version from Maeve though I cannot match the skill of that whistle(?) player. It is a Scottish tune Peter ( 
) though my playing may ave disguised that well enough to fool you. I first heard the tune as Morag’s Lament in the film ‘Rob Roy’ and like Katherine Mathesons vocals the best. MTGuru kindly transposed the tune to ABC for me you can find it in this old thread. I am not sure how faithful I have been to the transcription as once I have learned a tune I tend to forget the dots and just play what I want, how I want.
The falling away at the end of note thing can be done for three reasons, I reckon:
(1) Artistic effect
(2) Running out of breath
(3) Unsure when to end a note.
I would like to think that the first is the main reason here, but I have to admit that it it the latter two that likely predominate. I need better planning and breath control. I like the fall-away effect, but I am sure that, like most things, it is best used sparingly. My wife also criticises the large number of slides up - she says they make it sound a bit drunken. My problem is that I feel a tune like this needs some more ornamentation, but my other ornaments sound too staccato to me.
On which point, killthemessenger, what is the ‘repeated thirds motif’? I am ignorant of music theory to the point of embarrassment. I would like to try your suggestions, but could do with a little more of a hint, please. (Oh, and I am not sure I know anything of trad style).
The whistle is a Copeland low D, and the sound comes from pushing the notes almost to their limit, which seems to introduce a complexity into the tone. I love it when I get it right, but it is a fine edge to dance along, and I do not have the skill down well enough yet to control the pitch completely at the same time. I also blame my ear, which although improving, is not yet a good-enough discriminator of pitch. Practice, and more practice.
I was actually pleased that no-one commented on the the thing that I found hardest - for the first time I am using the second harmonic (of E,F#,G to get b,c,d’) to reach the third D in a slow tune. New ground for me.
So thanks folks - encouraging with pointers to improve. I will practice the tune for a while now, and record a good version when it is ready.
I did not even realise I was doing this. 
I thank all of you folk who took the time to listen and comment. Five years ago I could not have claimed any real musical skills - as Ben can bear witness 
If I have made good progress it is due in large part to the support, encouragement and help I have received from musicians both on and off this forum.
You’ll be poking me harder when I tell you it’s on Capercaillie’s To the Moon and Grace and Pride and I’ve had both those albums since they came out!
Naaaa, it was my playing that disguised the tune.
It’s really hard to play with an American accent!
Now you’ve got me wondering, Phill… are you actually playing XXXOOO for that top D (which I sometimes do on cylindrical whistles if OXXOOO, OXXXXX, XXXXXX etc. are out) or just OXXOOO (which I’d regard as my ‘regular’ fingering)? Likewise XXXXXO for the high B and XXXXOO for the C# (where I’m sure you meant the sharp)? All of which I can see working on a conical whistle like the Copeland when I’ve just tested them (and found them to be in) on my Copley flute…
Correct on two points, Peter. I am using xxxooo for the top D. I wanted a smooth transition b → c# → d’, and I have not found an occasion where I actually like oxxooo.
I don’t feel qualified to comment - you play a lot better than I do. The playing sounds fine, and the tone of the whistle is lovely.
But I’m curious about one thing - I didn’t recognise the tune, even though it’s one of my favourite Capercaillie tracks, and I saw the name, and expected to recognise it, and I still didn’t. One possibility is that I’ve been fooled by Capercaillie’s elaborate arrangement, and stripped of that, I don’t know the tune as well as I thought I did. Another possibility is that you were playing at a very much slower tempo - or does it just seem slower when the words aren’t there?
I’m curious as to whether an awareness of the words of a song affects the phrasing when playing instrumentally, and if so how much. This is not to say either that it should or it shouldn’t, but does it?
PS do you know any good sessions in W Somerset? I visit family there sometimes.
Thank you.
That is a good question, but not one I feel qualified to answer. I find the percussive element of their arrangement a little intrusive, though it does drive the tune forward relentlessly. I like Karen’s vocals the best of all the versions, but the fragment in ‘Rob Roy’ works better for me. (Have you seen this video using their track, it is stunning). I prefer the version by Meav, and that is the one that influences me most. Give it a listen and you may be able to link all three versions mentally then.
I know of several sessions around here, though ‘good’ depends upon what you want. You could do worse than start by looking at SADFolk, or The Acoustic Calendar For Wessex.