A test of banknotes in circulation in Dublin found traces on 100% of the examined euro notes. Ah the Celtic tiger!
more here
And on 65% of the dollar bills in the U.S.! No wonder I always feel like I’m in a fog. (Still…I’d like to see a larger sampling than 45 banknotes.)
Susan
The other day they found 15 kilo or so of cocaine in boxes of bananas at a number of supermarkets in Cork. The Gardai said it was probably a ‘logistical error’ 
Yeah, they meant for it to be with the apples.
I’ll bet they’d have found traces on 100% of $100 dollar bills. 
At first I thought this was a really desparate way for a student to keep up with his habit. Then I realized that they were on to something much bigger. What a great way to curb counterfeiting! Just make it official that all bills have to contain a certain percentage trace of blow. Brilliant!
djm
This might explain the allure of the smell of money…
I can’t decide which bothers me more: cocaine on money or fecal matter on shopping cart handles…
Susan
Thank you for that, Susan. Thank you. 
I’ve seen paper money referred to as “FBIRDs” (Fecal Bacteria Infected Rag Dollars).
If its allowed in our Corn Flakes, it shouldn’t bother you on your shopping cart handles.
Yup, yet another sign of totally awesome '80s nostalgia…
My favorite coke-related story happened at Penn State in the mid-'80s. There was a Chinese food cart in the quad that did very brisk business and their chow mein was incredibly popular. Nobody could explain it, because it didn’t particularly taste all that great apparently, but people had to have it; they’d get angry and even physically violent if the cart ran out of the stuff. This went on for a few years before the cart was raided by police and it was discovered that the cook had been spiking the chow mein with cocaine.
That must have been some expensive chow mein. 
… well, I now know that I’ll never get any sleep, ever again…
Yeah, but what’s the cocaine content of the fecal matter on the shopping cart handles?
And I have to go grocery shopping, now. Ew. Ew.
Or insect parts in orange juice concentrate. I remember Consumer Reports did a review many years ago on orange juice, and they ranked the brands based on which ones had the fewest insect parts – in other words they ALL contained insect parts, just some brands consistently had more insect parts than others. I hope in the intervening years that problem has been addressed, but it did turn me off orange juice for a while and I squeezed my own for many years.
Ever watch wine grapes being pressed? Of course the eventual alcohol works on all the bug(mostly spider) mush, but we had lots of neighbors who would catch the juice as it came out of the press to drink. Tasty,yes, if you don’t think what’s in that juice.
There have been tests done on shopping cart handles and fecal matter was, indeed, one of the lovely things found. I usually carry little individually-wrapped wipes in my purse and won’t touch a cart handle without wiping it off. I’ve even gone so far as to pull my hands inside my coat sleeves and push the cart with that protection. Some stores now supply wipes at the cart area for wiping off the handles.
Susan
Just don’t ask how many frogs can make it through in wine…blech…
I’m serious…