Ten signs you are too old to trick-or-treat...

Poststructural Pub
1

I saw this in an email.


    1. You get winded from knocking on the door.

  1. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.

  2. You ask for high fiber candy only.

  3. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.

  4. People say, “Great Boris Karloff Mask.” and you’re not even wearing a mask.

  5. When the door opens you yell, “Trick or…” and can’t remember the rest.

  6. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of restraining orders.

  7. You have to make sure your hearing aid is working.

  8. You’re the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker.

  9. You keep having to go home to use the restroom.

2

Never!
The only thing that would destroy the holiday for me is if Hallmark turns it into another McHoliday. Then I will only be left with the leap year bash, dressing like a fool on April 1, and my equinox black and tan parties.

3
  1. When you don’t stoop down to pick up coins in the parking lot anymore. :slight_smile:
4

I was joking to my wife about what to give children and said “just tape a dime to a post cards” The lady next to us in the store (no one else even in the same isle) said “My dad use to give ten pennies wrapped in tinfoil and made use wrap them the day before.”

Later my wife said “how do you do that?”
“What?” I said after another such incident.
“Say something out loud that will invite complete strangers to tell us something strange and personal.”

5

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

Guess I’m still good for another fifty, sixty years or so then.

:wink: (Starts digging around for an old halloween mask.)

6

My last year of trick-or-treating door to door was at 13yrs old in a lame, who cares costume. I went with my best friend, who was the same age, but way taller and bigger than me. He had become tired of wearing his costume and discarded it. An old woman looked at him and said, “Don’t you think you should quit this when you’re his age?” referring to me. I said, “Yeah, Dave, what were you thinking?” We were running from house to house to collect as much candy as possible before it got too late. Lame, but fun.
Tony

7

I went as a freshman in college and one lady told us that we were too old for this and shouldn’t we be at the bars or something? We were amused, especially as no one was old enough to get into any of the local bars.

8

When you can’t stoop down to pick up coins in the parking lot anymore. :cry:

Steve

9

When you find that you can nolonger pull on the tights of your Batman costume. :smiley:

10

Holy Crapp, since when is anyone too old for candy?!?!??

My kids still go out.
I hand out the treats in my witch costume, and I have passed out plenty of treats to teenagers without costumes. It’s all fun.

M

11

When you keep going to the same house, over and over again, because you can’t remember if you went there yet. :astonished:

12

…well, these aren’t for really old folks, but…

\

  • When your parole officer is tagging along with you.

  • When you hope that someone will be giving out cigarettes instead of candy.


    Tom

13

Heck, I’ve been offered beer before!

Granted, this was a student rental house and I think they were being facetious, but that’s not to say that they wouldn’t have actually given the beer to a couple of 14 year olds had we tried to take them up on their offer. “Sorry, we’re all out of candy… we’ve got beer though!”