The nuns who taught school beat us with yard sticks and pointers. What the heck kind of nun has access to a frozen pike? You folks are making this stuff up.
That’s why I am Lutheran. Growing up the pastors just gave us that severe German look and we just froze in our tracks. No beatings required. Mind control. Works every time.
Plus, Luther liked to go to the pub where I have it on firm authority that he never beat anyone with a frozen fish.
I just can’t wait til Jim actually returns and reads how this thread started out as an honest inquiry into his whereabouts and well-being, and evolved into a discussion of Catechism, almost good enough for the Rubber Room.
Yeah, he ate too many frozen pike. It gave him worms. His fellow monks (there were 95 of them, give or take) teased him about his wormy diet, so he protested their inquisitiveness, and ended up nailing the 95 teasers to the church door.
I read that on the internet somewhere.
Hope that helps–
Tom
p.s. Jim, PLEASE come back soon and put this thread out of its misery!
The Rite I confessions are quiet well “worded” too-
Here’s the one we use-
Almighty God,
Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
maker of all things, judge of all men:
We acknowledge and bewail our manifold sins
and wickedness,
which we from time to time most grievously have committed,
by thought, word, and deed, against thy divine Majesty,
provoking most justly thy wrath and indignation against us.
We do earnestly repent,
and are heartily sorry for these our misdoings;
the remembrance of them is grievous unto us,
the burden of them is intolerable.
Have mercy upon us,
have mercy upon us, most merciful Father;
for thy Son our Lord Jesus Christ’s sake,
forgive us all that is past;
and grant that we may ever hereafter
serve and please thee in newness of life,
to the honor and glory of thy Name;
through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
I prefer Rite I myself. I love the way the words go together and the Baptist that still lurks in me somewhere likes the fact that the whole service dwells more on sin.
