Watching As The World Turns With My Wife and Daughters

dubhlinn
Posted: Wed Jul 07, 2004 5:35 pm Post subject:


Will there be advertisments?

Slan,
D.

I’m sure Dale would appreciate the advertising revenue.
:smiley:

Would we have to change the name, though, from “soap operas” (derived, as I understand it, from the selling of laundry detergent during commercials) to “whistle operas”?


But… imagine the ads!

“Get the NEW Tooter 3001! Electronically enhanced to ALWAYS play in tune, with a built in fingering accelerator to speed your playing up to FOUR TIMES FASTER than any other whistle, AND it comes with a free laser-guided fingering aid and four memory sticks of pre-recorded tunes!”

Whoa! (And for once I don’t mean WhOA) I had a vague idea about the origins of the term (soap opera), but didn’t know the soap advertising was really the root of these ongoing sagas. Thanks, Missy!

Obviously, we need sponsors – and FAST!

:astonished: :astonished:
Missy,
I seem to remember reading somewhere that Proctor and Gambols logo was a satanic symbol.
Is this the right direction for our soap opera??

BTW, lovely dulcimer playing on your link.

Slan,
D.

:wink:

thanks, Slan.

As to our “satanic symbol” - I used to have a sign I’d post on my door with the old “moon and stars” stating: “My duties are purely ceremonial”. My section head just doesn’t have a sense of humor!!! :smiley:
Ok, more trivia:
The “moon and stars” actually started way back in the 1850’s. Illiterate wharf hands used the symbol of a “star” on the boxes of Star Candles manufactured by William Procter and James Gamble. Some bored worker added a circle around the star, then another artistic worker made the circle into a half moon. The “stylized” moon was adopted in the 1860’s, with 13 stars added (I forget which one, Procter or Gamble, but one of them was a historical buff, and added the 13 stars for the 13 original colonies of the US).
We stopped using the “moon and stars” emblem in the mid-80’s due to the rumor mill. Which a lot of us at the time did NOT agree with.

Missy

:slight_smile:
Thank’s missy,

My memory is not as bad as I thought.

Slan,
D.

P.S.
“Slan” is the Irish word for Bye.

:laughing:

I prefer Coronation Street, which just went primetime, four knights a week on the Calgary Bubblegum Company’s network here in Canada.

http://www.itv.com/page.asp?partid=91

MarkB

ignores Jerry

There will definitely be advertising, for one reason only: you have to have a place for a dramatic pause when there are major bombshells, e.g., Dale having a bad knock on the head that brings back his memory, only to realize that in real life he’s one of the Watergate burglars on the lam from the minimum security prison farm where he’d spent the last 30 years repaying his debt to society.

Well, try to ignore this!

I have a signed affidavit from this cat placing you and Bloomfield at the scene of the crime. That’s one angry cat, who’s vowed to track you down and make you pay. (Of course, I’m willing to negotiate a reasonable “settlement” on your behalf.)

Stay tuned …

Best wishes,
Jerry

Having wandered in a semi-amnesiac state for several hours, the partially revived BroSteve, Azalin and MurphyStout mysteriously find themselves in the computer lab at Oxford, where they find Davey Spillane aka Walden generating crop circle templates on the supercomputer. They hurriedly get on the next plane home. Meanwhile cut to Chuck Clark passing through immigrations in the other direction…

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Walden, DBA Davy Spillane, is hammering out an exclusive distribution deal with Stefano, representing the Dimera syndicate.

In walks Kim in Tulsa, whom we haven’t seen in a couple years, and is now being played by that actress who used to be on The Edge of Night. Walden is taken aback, momentarily, and cuts to a commercial for Waldco-Brite, which fights ring-around-the-collar 7 ways.™

When the story returns, we find attorneys Melvin Belly and Cleon Lee attempting to make sense of some horrid whistle-like things that appear to be made of half melted Earring Magic Ken dolls. Losing interest quickly, in the case, they put in a video tape of the Filipino telenovella Gretchen, and Melvin remarks that she’s way prettier than some half-melted Ken, anyway.

Scene cuts to Brady’s Pub, where a dazed and confused MurphyStout is trying to remember how he was transported from Willy Week to Salem, and why on earth he has the aftertaste of Pepsi-Cola lingering with him. Meanwhile, in walks The Weekenders and Rando7, who are now hosts of the local talk radio show Rando and Lance in the Morning, which is, at present facing litigation from none other than the left-of-center music retailer Lark in the Morning, ostensibly based on similarity of names.

In walks Attorney Belly, with papers, from the LITM suit. “Umm,” says Rando7, why is there a half-baked action figure stuck to your briefcase?"

“Umm” mutters Mr. Belly, “I was … uhh, watching a , uhh, novella, on the teevee and, uh…”

Ken is most certainly NOT an action figure. It is for this reason that Barbie dumped him for the Aussie dude, Blaine.

(I am undoubtedly, at this point in the story, seeking revenge on ChuckClark for all that cash bilking, by submitting his photo as the prototype for Barbie’s next boyfriend.)

now, wait a minute - before this story goes ANY further, you are missing some elements essential to a “good” soap opera (is there such a thing?)

You don’t have a hospital. You MUST have a hospital. You can introduce it by someone coming down with some dreaded disease - but you have to then go into character development of all the nurses and doctors that work there. Don’t forget to include a psych ward, you’ll need it eventually for your character that develops multiple personalities…
You need some type of school - high school or college - so you can have an illicit love affair between a student and teacher…
Remember, no elementary school age children. All kids must either be newborn, or teens (and therefore seeking sex). Kids between the ages of, oh, 4 to 12 do not add a THING to the story line.

Now - you could also add some elements of the GREATEST, MOST WONDERFUL soap opera of all times - Dark Shadows!!! You can then add a witch, vampire, werewolf, gypsy and others to the story. Think of the musical possibilities this opens up!!!

Carry on…


Missy

Can we have the multiple personalities gig?

I love the Dark Shadows concept. I volunteer to change my handle to “Quentin.” I will fear, but be strangely compelled by, whistling in the moonlight.

Today’s episode finds attorney Melvin Belly in the psych ward of Chiff Valley Hospital. “Tell me,” Dr. Wisely asks calmly, “at what age did your mother begin buying you Ken dolls.”

“Oh, goodness, I don’t know, Dale. I can’t remember not having them around. I know I had several Kens at the age of three.”

“Well, let me put it to you a different way,” Wisely continued, “at what point did Ken begin singing?”

“Singing?” quoth Belly, “He never ever said a word, other than maybe the occasional suggestion to pilfer a candy bar, until that time at his 15th birthday party…”

“Ahem… Ken’s birthday?” inquired Wisely.

“Yes. Why?”

“No reason. Please continue.”

“Anyway,” continued Mr. Belly, “several of us kids were playing blind man’s bluff when Holly Hobbie suggested we try smoking the Declaration of Independence.”

-Cut to scene at Walden Ranch.-

Stefano: So we have a deal, then. The Dimera Syndicate has exclusive rights to all black market recordings?

Walden: What? If you have the rights, how is that black market?

Stefano: (clears throat) No reason.

Walden: Very well then, I have a meeting with the Irish Pepsi-Cloners’ Association in a couple days, and I need to do some things to get ready, so I’ll take my leave. Help yourself to milk and cookies.

organ music

Will the administrators at Chiff Valley Hospital find out about Dr. Wisely’s past as a Watergate burglar/evil genius/amnesiac?

Will Jerry Freeman ever find the right Ken doll/whistle formula or have to move on to seeing what can be done with Silly Putty?

Will BroSteve, Az, and Murph ever find their way out of the permanent fog in which they seem to find themselves?

Will Emmline ever get her money back from Chuck Clark or will she have to spend the rest of her days busking on street corners dressed in the tattered 1970’s hotpants she got at the thrift store?

Will the Nanohedrons ever be able to resolve their differences?

Will Gretchen ever get Dale to admit to being Ramon’s father or will she spend the rest of her life working as a yodeler in the Swiss restaurant in Mexico City?

Will we ever find the right characters to work into the teacher/high school student fling story line? (considering Bloomfield or Martin Milner for this…)

Will Dick Clark’s hair ever turn grey?

Stay tuned for answers to these questions…and much, much more…

Oxadol? Just the mention of the name brings back memories.



Missy I am anxious to get home and listen to your MP3s. I have a mountain dulcimer but I’ve never been able to quite get the hang of it. I can’t tell what I’m missing. Maybe I’m making it too complicated. Anyway I’ll PM with more questions I’m sure. And the P&G trivia is great stuff.

Now back to our regularly scheduled program.

AAUGGHHHHH!!!

How does she KNOW?!?!?!

The silly putty accoustical studies were locked in the vault!

MOUSE?!? (The problem with having a mouse assistant is, you can never be sure if he’s the real Mouse or an imposter.)

Has the Global Pennywhistle Tweaking Research and Production Consortium Headquarters been INFILTRATED? Or is Susanfx simply trying to sow seeds of discord and SABOTAGE our important work?

And the most important question of all …

WHY is she doing this? What is the terrible secret that’s compelling her to reveal the confidential inner workings of GPT&PC Headquarters?

Ominous sounding organ music

Stay tuned …

Best wishes,
Jerry

OK, I want to know HOW Dr. Wisely got his amnesia?

Was it a blow on the head by a WMD during a brawl in an Irish pub in the middle of Cajun territory?

Or is it some deeper, darker secret that he has repressed so well that he cannot remember anything else about his past life, even as it happens? What could that deep, dark secret be? What of his intense interest in Mr. Belly’s relationship with Ken? Is he truely interested in helping, or is there something from his past that he has a very vague rememberance of that he is not able, or wants to recall…

… very quick memory flash to a young Dr. Wisely holding a doll of some sort, not enough to see what kind, but you sort of get the idea …

And, methinks, a visit to a Swiss doctor might be in order for said amnesiac.

I happen to know a Swiss Doctor, who is currently in Edinburgh. But the name eludes me at the moment… wossisname…