Okay, all joking aside! 
- It is a wise father that knows his own child. -bard
- The quality of mercy is not strained . . . -bard
- Wouldst thou have a serpent sting thee twice? -bard
- A Daniel come to judgment! Yea, a Daniel! -bard
- Like a fair house, built on another man’s ground. -bard
- Condemn the fault, and not the actor of it? -bard
- Truth is truth to the end of reckoning. -bard
- Such duty as the subject owes the prince, even such a woman oweth to her husband. -bard
- No legacy is so rich as honesty. -bard
- Yet do I fear thy nature; it is too full of the milk of human kindness. -bard
- Nothing will [can] come of nothing. -bard
- The devil hath power to assume a pleasing shape. -bard
- Be thou as chaste as ice, as pure as snow . . . -bard
- Confess yourself to heaven; Repent what’s past; avoid what is to come. -bard
- There is no new thing under the sun. -both
- For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. -bible
- The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak. -bible
- The race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong . . . -bible
- Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some have unwittingly entertained angels. -bible
- Do not let the sun go down on your anger. -bible
- Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools. -bible
- Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid. -bible
- I was shapened in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me. -bible
- God loveth a cheerful giver. -bible
- For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. -bible
- O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory? -bible
- The desire accomplished is sweet to the soul. -bible
- Let us eat and drink; for tomorrow we shall die. -bible
- Some friends play at friendship, but a true friend sticks closer than one’s nearest kin. -bible
- Stay me with flagons, comfort me with apples: for I am sick of love. -bible
- Blessed are the merciful; for they shall obtain mercy. -bible
- A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all things. -bible
- He who gathers money little by little makes it grow. -bible
- A good name is better than precious ointment. -bible
- Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace, is counted wise: and he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding. -bible
- Wealth maketh many friends. -bible
- Wisdom is better than weapons of war. -bible
- I thank my God everytime I remember you. -bible
Now here’s one for you:
Which of these was both WRITTEN in stone and CALLED the 10 commandments according to the bible?
Exodus 20:
3 Thou shalt have no other gods before me.
4 Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.
5 Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;
6 And shewing mercy unto thousands of them that love me, and keep my commandments.
7 Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.
8 Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy.
9 Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work:
10 But the seventh day is the sabbath of the LORD thy God: in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates:
11 For in six days the LORD made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: wherefore the LORD blessed the sabbath day, and hallowed it.
12 Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.
13 Thou shalt not kill.
14 Thou shalt not commit adultery.
15 Thou shalt not steal.
16 Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour.
17 Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour’s.
OR
Exodus 34:
12 Take heed to thyself, lest thou make a covenant with the inhabitants of the land whither thou goest, lest it be for a snare in the midst of thee:
13 But ye shall destroy their altars, break their images, and cut down their groves:
14 For thou shalt worship no other god: for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God:
15 Lest thou make a covenant with the inhabitants of the land, and they go a whoring after their gods, and do sacrifice unto their gods, and one call thee, and thou eat of his sacrifice;
16 And thou take of their daughters unto thy sons, and their daughters go a whoring after their gods, and make thy sons go a whoring after their gods.
17 Thou shalt make thee no molten gods.
18 The feast of unleavened bread shalt thou keep. Seven days thou shalt eat unleavened bread, as I commanded thee, in the time of the month Abib: for in the month Abib thou camest out from Egypt.
19 All that openeth the matrix is mine; and every firstling among thy cattle, whether ox or sheep, that is male.
20 But the firstling of an ass thou shalt redeem with a lamb: and if thou redeem him not, then shalt thou break his neck. All the firstborn of thy sons thou shalt redeem. And none shall appear before me empty.
21 Six days thou shalt work, but on the seventh day thou shalt rest: in earing time and in harvest thou shalt rest.
22 And thou shalt observe the feast of weeks, of the firstfruits of wheat harvest, and the feast of ingathering at the year’s end.
23 Thrice in the year shall all your menchildren appear before the LORD God, the God of Israel.
24 For I will cast out the nations before thee, and enlarge thy borders: neither shall any man desire thy land, when thou shalt go up to appear before the LORD thy God thrice in the year.
25 Thou shalt not offer the blood of my sacrifice with leaven; neither shall the sacrifice of the feast of the passover be left unto the morning.
26 The first of the firstfruits of thy land thou shalt bring unto the house of the LORD thy God. Thou shalt not seethe a kid in his mother’s milk.
If you know the answer, please don’t tell anyone as this would upset all of Christianity.