THe Undisputed's Lovely Experience

Poststructural Pub
1

I just had one of the peak moments of my 25 year career as a psychologist. I wanted to share with my whistle-blowing friends.

Some of you may remember that I do a website called www.parentingteendrivers.com, designed to do a little to combat the plague of auto accidents among new drivers. In addition, I have a workshop for parents I do on this topic…I’ve been doing it two or three times a year for 10 years.

So, I got invited to the Reform Temple here in Birimgham, Temple Emanuel, to do my workshop for a crowd of about 50 parents, who also brought their soon-to-be-driving kids. I did it today at 9:30 a.m., leading up to the Shabbat service. The parents were very receptive and the young people looked appropriately miserable, since much of my talk is designed to motivate parents to be tough on this driving thing and to keep firm rules and insist on a “driving contract,” etc., etc.

At the conclusion of my talk, they began the Shabbat service and I was privileged to attend. The rabbi did a remarkable job of finding and preaching on an appropriate passage from the Torah and then tying it nicely into a message for the young people about protecting themselves and others by making smart choices about driving and other perils of life.

The rabbi then had all of the teenagers come up and, slightly sullen tho some were, they all recited a prayer in Hebrew together. Then the parents came up, put their hands on their own kids, and, again in Hebrew, recited a Traveler’s Prayer, which according to the Talmud, should be said at the beginning of a journey. Then each young person was presented with a beautiful key chain. On one side of the key chain is the picture and logo of the temple, and on the other, this short prayer, in Hebrew and English:

May God guard our going out and coming in, for life and for peace, from now and forever.


The Traveler’s Prayer should be recited at the beginning of a journey, according to the Talmud. In the prayer, the traveler asks for a safe trip.

Here is a translitered version of the Traveler’s Prayer (from The Transliterated Siddur):

“Ye-hi ra-tson mi-l’fa-ne-cha,
A-do-nai e-lo-hei-nu vei-lo-hei a-vo-tei-nu,
she-to-li-chei-nu l’sha-lom,
v’ta-tsi-dei-nu l’sha-lom,
v’tad-ri-chei-nu l’sha-lom,
v’ta-gi-ei-nu lim-choz chef-tsei-nu,
l’cha-yim ul-sim-chah ul-sha-lom.
V’ta-tsi-lei-nu mi-kaf kawl o-yeiv,
v’o-reiv v’lis-tim v’cha-yot ra-ot ba-de-rech,
u-mi-kawl mi-nei fur -a-ni-yot,
ha-mit-ra-g’shot la-vo la-o-lam.
V’tish-lach b’ra-chah b’chawl ma-a-sei ya-dei-nu,
v’ti-t’nei-nu l’chein ul-che-sed ul-ra-cha-mim b’ei-ne-cha,
uv-ei-nei chawl ro-ei-nu.
V’tish-ma kol ta-cha-nu-nei-nu,
ki Eil sho-mei-a t’fi-lah v’ta-cha-nun a-tah.
Ba-ruch a-tah A-do-nai,
sho-mei-a t’fi-lah.”

“May it be Your will, Lord, My God and God of my ancestors, to lead me, to direct my steps, and to support me in peace. Lead me in life, tranquil and serene, until I arrive at where I am going. Deliver me from every enemy, ambush and hurt that I might encounter on the way and from all afflictions that visit and trouble the world. Bless the work of my hands. Let me receive divine grace and those loving acts of kindness and mercy in Your eyes and in the eyes of all those I encounter. Listen to the voice of my appeal, for you are a God who responds to prayerful supplication. Praised are you, Lord, who responds to prayer.”

Anyway, there were many non-dry eyes in the house, including many of the parents, a scattering of the faux-sullen teens, the rabbi, and yours truly. I am grateful for the experience.

Wanted to share.



Dale

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Very lovely, Dale. A non-dry eye here as well. My daughter turns 16 in May.

Carol

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My 2nd goes for the license this month.

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You do a great service for all of us, Dale, and I’m glad you get some reward in return.

As soon as my little one is able to see out the front of the car, I’m going to start pointing out the pitfalls, right and wrong things to do behind the wheel.

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My older girl just finished her first session in a car with an instructor today - a very timely message, and a wonderful tale to go with it.

I’ve visited Dale’s site before - methings it’s time for a return visit, with my daughter.

Dana

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This is excellent, Dale. I’m going to print it out, one copy for each of my kids and one for me to carry with me, to read as I begin each journey. It’s particularly appropriate for me, as I’m going to Israel in a few months.

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That prayer would work well for our armed forces personel … they are constantly in harms way.

May they arrive at their destination safely and may it be home.

Thanks Dale

Jim

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That’s what I dig about you Dale: Always doing some good for the neighborhood :slight_smile: Groovy.

Loren

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Good on ya, Dale. I concur with Loren. And I’ll add that those kinds of things DO make a difference. :slight_smile:

Best,
Paul

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Nice story Dale. Sounds like an innovative Rabbi. At Shabbat services, our own Rabbi frequently asks people who are planning on traveling within the next several weeks to rise, and he offers the same prayer. Even travel done for fun carries some level of anxiety, and this is really a nice gesture and a comfort.

For those who like this traveler’s prayer, it is available in portable form:
http://www.jewishsource.com/cgi-bin/sgin0101.exe?FNM=00&T1=97790&UID=2004120415581611&UREQA=1

This item resembles a mezuzzah that you’d find on the doorpost(s) of a Jewish home, but it contains the prayer that Dale mentioned in his posting, not the usual Bible quotations normally found in a mezuzzah. My wife and I received these as a gift from a non-Jewish relative. At first I thought somewhat cynically about it, but I find that I really enjoy having it in my car. As I bustle about from place in a typical 21st Centurey rush, it reminds me of the more important aspects of life.

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Dale,
That is a wonderful prayer!

Had I known it, I would have said it for my wife to be. Then for my three kids. And for my older sister who was almost 60 before learning to drive. I took them all for the tests. And now my grandaughter, who is learning. is certainly going to have its benefit! Thank The LORD I don’t have to take her!

You’re a hero; that I know!

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That’s really cool, Dale! Something like that would probably go over really well at our own church.

Robin

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Thanks for sharing and thanks for doing good in this world. Very appropriate to the season. My oldest gets license in 15 mos or so, fwiw.

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Very nice, this would make a nice song (I’m sure they already a version - many scriptures and siddur prayers are put to music).

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I love your new avatar, Daniel! :slight_smile:

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I made it last year. - It just proves that I don’t throw anything away.

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Does the key of the whistle determine the color of the flame?



Dale,

Cool prayer. I like to read those kind of things. It reminds me where the roots of my faith in Christ originate. Helps to keep the perspective that He wasn’t a white anglo-saxon protestent from midwest USA.

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A great experience and a great prayer.

That story resonated with me because, for a variety of reasons, some of them personal, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the unnecessary loss of young life, not principally losses on the road but that is one major source. Recently I heard someone say that as many people die on American roads as a result of drunken driving each year as perished in the attacks of September 11. (Even if this is something of an exaggeration it would still be a chilling statistic if it were even remotely close.) The person who made that claim went on to question why there was no ‘war on drunken driving’ but, whatever he or she intended the moral to be, it is a shocking statistic. Even if there can’t really be a ‘war’ on terror any more than there can be a ‘war’ on crime or poverty, crime and terror still need to be effectively opposed and hunger needs to be dealt with. It’s great to see that there actually are people like Dale willing to deal with road carnage at a grass roots level which is surely where effective change must begin.

I assume that there is no ‘war’ on road carnage because too many in the community regard the carnage as the price you pay for a free-wheeling life style. I doubt that people consciously think this, more likely they just avoid facing up to it. So it is good that there are people willing to talk about the dangers openly, however reluctant young people are to hear it. I imagine most of us who survived our first few years on the roads recognise with hindsight that we really learnt to drive after we received our licenses and through a very dangerous process of trial and error.

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Oh, I’m afraid the truth is much worse than that.

The number one cause of death for 15-20 year olds is car collisions.

In 2002, The National Center for Statistics and Analysis reported that 8,278 adolescents (ages 15-20) were involved in fatal crashes.

324,000 teens were injured in collisions in 2002.

In the United States, 38,252 men, women and children died in automobile crashes in 2003.

# In the United States, 38,252 men, women and children died in automobile crashes in 2003.

Of that latter number, roughly 40% are alcohol related. It’s way more than 9/11. Year after year after year.

http://www-fars.nhtsa.dot.gov/finalReport.cfm?stateid=0&year=2003&title=Crashes&title2=Alcohol

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Yeah. And that’s why I get so road raged with tail gaters and people who drive vehicles far beyond their capacity to handle. People who drive gigantic SUV’s, trucks and hummers who think they are an excuse to treat other drivers like chaff.
I’ll stop here because I can’t say anything good about that subject.