Dear xxx,
I talked to Father XXX and he will let me play inside the church. However, he says absolutely not to your aunt’s choice of Onward Christian Soldiers as a recessional. Can you check with your aunt so she knows I can’t play that hymn (the priest was quite adamant about it).
yours etc.
Reply:
Hi,
My aunt understands the issue with the recessional. She has asked if you could play the Onward Christian Soldiers at the cemetery and additionally, instead of Danny Boy at the graveside, could you play When Irish Eyes are Smiling and Too Ra Loo Ra Loo Ral if possible.
Thanks
I play that shite all the time. I’m a professional and when I’m hired I do my best to deliver what the client wants. At funerals I’ve played Take Me Out To The Ball Game, Beauty and the Beast, My Heart Will Go On, whatever the client asks for. I take pride in being able to play whatever is asked, and make it sound musical.
Having done quite a few hatches matches and despatches we must have a totally different system oe’er here.Never once have I asked the priest is it ok to play honkey tonk woman or whatever..in fact I never see the priest until the appointed time and by then it is too late to do anything as he is busy doing his priestly bit and I am doing my thing.I might add that I have never had a single complaint frae the clergy.I think ye suffer frae too much detail oe’er the pond.I agree wi the paying parties what to play, if it is too absurd then I say so and we chose something else.They are paying for my services not for me to pander to nonesense..Tho one of my more recent ones was the theme frae Dances wi Wolves sounded quite nice tho
Slán Go Foill
Uilliam
The one that still gets me is how many people desperately want “Amazing Grace” played at their wedding.
Whenever this happens, I am tempted to say in a perfectly calm and deadpan voice, “I’m sorry, but you’re obviously very stupid people that have no appreciation for meaning and you’ll almost certainly breed stupid children that you will name “Britney” or “Skylie” or something and I cannot bring myself to play any part in your moronically festive nuptuals in good conscience.”
But of course, I would never actually say any of that (though there was one time when I was sorely tempted). If the price is right, I’ll play anything.
Except “Take Me Out to the Ball Game.” That’s where I draw the line…
The best weddings and funerals are the ones where whoever is in charge explains the event to me and asks “Well, what do you think would be appropriate?” and I can then play them a selection of stuff and they can pick what they like the best. These people also generally understand that your time is a valuable commodity and pay you accordingly; even if they can’t afford to pay you much, they try to make things worth your while somehow. The best wedding I ever played was for a couple that worked at a winery in the Willamette Valley. They couldn’t afford to pay me much, but they threw in two cases of wine (of my choice) to sweeten the deal…As a broke college student at the time, you have no idea how sweet a deal that was. The look on my roommate’s face as I dragged the cases through the door was priceless…Mmm…That was some damn fine cabernet…Shoulda saved a bottle…
I had a friend who married a girl who reeeeeally disliked me. I was invited to the wedding, then uninvited, then invited . . . to play pipes. I discovered that I buried my wife and danced on top of her grave make a super bridal march for the surly bride.
One of the best piping experiences was at a “dining in” ceremony for the naval ROTC unit at my university. At the point at which they raise a toast to fallen comrades, I played The marine’s hymn very slowly and dirge-like. The CO had a glass of extremely fine whisky brought to me afterward. Mmmm!
sounded quite nice tho 