OT: Involving Children in Music

Whistle
1

I was wondering what your experience and opinions are about involving kids in music. Our experiences, opinions and parenting methods may vary greatly but I’m curious about how other people feel. I have searched the net for any books or articles for parents who are interested in getting their children into music and have come up pretty empty-handed.

I have several things I have been curious about.

  • Are any of you getting your children involved in music? If so why?
  • If you don’t have children now what are your plans if/when you have children?
  • What ages did you start them?
  • What instruments are they learning?
  • Did you choose their instruments or are you letting them decide?
  • Are you involving them in learning music whether or not they are showing any interest?
  • How do you deal with their changing interests as they get older?
  • How do you keep them motivated and interested?
  • Are you playing as a family?

I appreciate hearing your experiences with your children. I am currently teaching my 7yr old son the Whistle and he will start taking lessons in classical guitar next month. My wife and 5 year old daughter are currently taking Scottish Fiddle lessons together.

Thanks,

Craig







[ This Message was edited by: CraigMc on 2002-02-05 17:22 ]

2

I have three kids. The oldest is 11 and has been through three instruments already. The middle one wants drums. :slight_smile:

I tought the two oldest how to read music. And we play together alot. I have been teaching the youngest how to play the whistle. Her fingers are too small but she blows and I do the fingering for her. She can play Twinkle Twinkle pretty good.

I think the best way to get your kids intrested in music is involve them in it no matter how bad it sounds a first they get better.

LW

[ This Message was edited by: Lady Whistler on 2002-02-05 17:44 ]

3

I don’t have any hindsight for you since our little one still isn’t walking. I have thought about it quite a bit, though.

I have always loved music, and it’s obvious that our 8-month-old does, too. She ought to, because she’s heard music, either through the stereo or my whistling, since she was conceived. She gets that great toothless grin on her face the minute she sees me walk into a room with a handful of whistles.

I started clarinet in school when I was about 8. I liked it, but wasn’t crazy about the structured nature of learning in school and playing in band. I really began liking playing when I took up the dulcimer, soon after dropping band. I still don’t like playing with other people.

My wife, OTOH, is to a much greater extent a structured learner. She was a music major for much of her college career.

So I think we’ll be doing a two-pronged approach – I’ve already given the little one two whistles (Gen G and F) and an ocharina. When she learns how to blow them, I’ll start trying to teach her a little (they say that about three years old is the earliest time to do this). My wife will probably do Suzuki with her. I think we’ll both be happy with this approach, will try to stick to it for some period of time, but won’t force anything on her.

Charlie

4

My parents had me take piano lessons as a kid. For a couple of years I couldn’t seem to learn how to read music and it was so frustrating for me that I quit the lessons. Then, a year or so later, I started getting interested in the piano again and slowly started figuring out how to read music.

Now I am everlastingly grateful that they had me take lessons–music is so fulfilling. They never forced me but provided the early exposure and the example and I was drawn back to it on my own.

I have an almost three-year-old daughter and a one-year-old son. As soon as they could sit up I sat them at the piano on my lap and let them bang away, praising them and clapping for them when they did so. We also had an old recorder lying around that I gave to them before they could even walk and showed them how to blow into, again praising and encouraging them.

Now that I’m into whistles, I got a cheap plastic one for my son and a Sweetone for my daughter after she’d used the plastic one for a while. She was so impressed that she had a “real” whistle that she’s taken good care of it and knows exactly how to put her fingers on the holes. She’s starting to grasp the concept of raising and lowering different fingers, and is quite proud of herself. We also have a kazoo and a harmonica lying around.

With all of this, I never forced them to play. I just provided the instruments and the example. Because they see me playing the piano or whistle and hear fun sounds coming out, they want to copy that and learn it on their own.

We also have family music time. My husband gets out his trombone or banjo and we all play an instrument, reinforcing the idea that music is fun and a fun way to be together as a family.

Since my children are still so young, I don’t know yet how I will deal with changing interests, etc., but I will continue to provide them with a wide variety of music and instruments and if they want to learn a different one as they get older, give them the opportunity to do so.

I hope that answers some of your questions. Good topic!

~Kiirsi

5

My mom sang, played guitar, and piano. As a kid she started me on piano lessons. Unfortunately we moved several times in several years and I never stayed with any instructor long enough to get very far. Also I never was able to read music with any great speed (which persists to this day).

I ended up with recorder and then whistle because it was highly portable (I moved several more times) and I didn’t have to worry about more that one hand at a time. I still have my mom’s piano, and my boyfriend plays guitar and some piano. So I am reasonably certain that ours will be a musical household. I hope that I will never force an instrument upon my child, and that the assortment of (reasonably replaceable) whistles about the house will be an incentive to start to play.

6

On 2002-02-05 17:08, CraigMc wrote:

  • Are any of you getting your children involved in music? If so why?
  • If you don’t have children now what are your plans if/when you have children?
  • What ages did you start them?
  • What instruments are they learning?
  • Did you choose their instruments or are you letting them decide?
  • Are you involving them in learning music whether or not they are showing any interest?
  • How do you deal with their changing interests as they get older?
  • How do you keep them motivated and interested?
  • Are you playing as a family?

I’ll try to answer your questions in order. Bear in mind that my son is only 15 months old, so many of your questions won’t apply for me until he’s older.

  • My son has involved himself in music. I’ve been playing pretty much non-stop for about 6.5 years…he’s heard since he was concieved. When he was less than a year old, he’d hold the whistle to my mouth so I’d play. Now, when i’m practicing, he’ll toddle over, grab a whistle off the desk, and plop down and blow C# (all open) for 10 and 15 minutes at a time. Quite an attention span, I think! :slight_smile: As to why involved a child in music? I think it’s good for their little brains, and their little souls, provided it doesn’t become a forced & negative experience.
  • He’s learning whistle, because I don’t want him to mess with my new fiddle. :wink: When he gets older, I’d be willing to bet he becomes interested in another instrument, which is OK by me.
  • I expect he’ll want to play something different when he gets older. In fact, I hope he does, so that I can dress him up like a little organ grinder monkey and he can dance and play bodhran while I busk. Just teasing…sorta :wink: Actually, it’d be nice to have some variety in the house, but if he chooses to take up whistling like his ol’ man, I’d probably be right proud.

That’s about it for my experiences so far…maybe I’ll get to revisit the topic when he’s older!

Greg


[ This Message was edited by: Wandering_Whistler on 2002-02-05 20:26 ]

7

I appreciate all of you that shared your experiences.

Both my parents graduated from college and my mother is great at the Piano. I’m not sure what happened but out of 6 kids only one can play an instrument and only one has graduated from college. I regret that my parents didn’t push both of these a little more.
I think the “60’s - 70’s” mentality of let the child raise itself was a backlash to the earlier period where everything was forced down your throat. ie…“Your Daddy was a coalminer so was his Daddy and Daddies Daddy and that’s what your gonna be!”. Left to my own interests, I didn’t end up doing much other than making forts in the woods and daydreaming. These were an important part of my growing up but I wish now I would have had a little more structure.

I recently listened to Mr. Pott’s interview on Scoiltrad and he mentioned that his instructor used to rap him on the fingers when he would play the whistle wrong. I got the feeling that he was raised in a little stricter environment than I was. My daughters Scottish Fiddle teacher told me his mother wanted him to learn the Violin because of someone she looked up to when she was younger. He said after playing for several years he learned to like it. I think there might be a little different approach in Scotland and Ireland than there is here. Getting his fingers rapped didn’t seem to discourage Sean from playing the Whistle or Pipes.

Because of my experience I have taken a more firm stance with my kids (encouragement wise…no finger rapping going on here :wink: ), while at the same time being sensitive to any other interest that may develop. We decided that “not” playing Music was not an option and that we would pick their instruments until they were old enough to decide there is another instrument that they will pursue with greater enthusiasm.

My wife and I feel that learning music is as important as the three R’s. A matter of fact the only info on this topic I can find on the web is a ton of positive statistics on the relationship with Music and good grades, reasoning ability, SAT scores etc… I would love for our family to be able to have our own sessions, but the most important thing is what music will do for their development as an individual and not how skilled a musician they turn out to be.
We hope that by learning and playing music as a family that it will bring us closer together.

So far it has not been easy mentally or financially. Being so young it’s tough to keep their attention for long. Every lesson we have to be right by their side. I know in the long run, this will be beneficial to them.

Craig

8

well,i first learned piano when i was 6.very incredibly i can play a song just by immitating my sister’s piano teacher.i picked up violin when i was in primary 6. although i achieved grade 8 in both instruments,i don’t really like playing violin.then i picked up tin whistle 2 months ago.it’s amazing.i love it!

i think if u want to foster a love of music in ur children,u should first let them listen to all kinds of instruments.for instance,bring them to stores and let them
hear what a tin whistle sounds like,what a violin sounds like,what a harp sounds like,then ask them if they do love any of these instrument like ’ do u want to play this instrument?’ try to tell them they are very interesting and they can play catchy songs after they’ve learnt these instruments.

that’s all i can help.it’s all based on my own opinion and experience

9

Hi Craig,

I don’t have children yet, but I was one once myself, and my parents made me play violin (not fiddle) and then clarinet, and also sing in the local Church choir every Sunday. Getting me to practise was like pulling chicken teeth. The logic behind violin was that I would form part of a string quartet with my brother on 'cello and father on viola. Result: my father still plays viola in a weekly string quartet but neither my brother nor I still play our instruments. And I don’t go to church either.

However that reluctant grounding has benefitted me enormously now as I was able to learn Guitar, then Mandolin, and now Whistle, much more easily then if I was coming to music for the first time.

If I could find fault, it would be that I didn’t get to hear enough music played, of all sorts - I was learning classical music, most of which is still (to me) boring and obscure. Had I heard Irish Traditional, Blues, Country etc I might wanted to play more at the time. My father played trumpet alongside scratchy 78 Jazz recordings from the 20s and 30s, but the violin didn’t lend itself to Jazz so I couldn’t join in. When I wanted to learn the trombone, I was told I couldn’t because someone else did locally (and if you’re thinking “whuh??” so did I at the time).

I have a niece of 2 years wh is fascinated when I play whistle or Mandolin, and can’t resist joining in or taking over, picking at the strings or blowing the whistle (one note again). I think most children respond to music, and should be encouraged but not forced. Exposure to all types of music should bring the desire to join in and emulate, but it should never become a chore.

Happy to meet and sorry to part

[ This Message was edited by: Martin Milner on 2002-02-06 09:47 ]

10

OK…I’m going to answer this from the other point of view…I’m the kid. First of all, I’ll start out with a little background history. My dad was interested in music because his mom (my grandma) played music a lot (mostly piano). So he decided to take up guitar. He still plays. I don’t know what age he was, but he picked up the fiddle somewhere along the road. Anyways, for as long as I can remember, he has always been playing music. In fact, I always hear stories about how my brother and I used to make him play the fiddle for us while we were taking a bath. When my brother was around four, my parents made him start taking Suzuki Violin. Then, a couple years later (I’m three now), they made me start taking it. Well, my brother and I both hated it. Luckily, after a few years, our parents let us start. I still play fiddle, but my brother quit when we moved here (Oklahoma). So I guess if you do choose a kids instrument, they may change, and they may not. Also, I picked up whistle about a year ago, and concertina about four and a half months ago. As for motivation…We don’t really have any. My brother, sister, and I play constantly, without our parents nagging us. Whenever we perform somewhere (that’s a little bit of motivation because we get money! $$)people always ask my dad if he makes us play and practice, and they’re always suprised by the answer..“No, they do it on their own because they love the music” Playing as a family: Sometimes, but most of the time its just one of us playing, learning new tunes, etc. That’s about all I can think of to write…

Brent

P.S. I started piano when I was about six and although I’m not playing right now, I know it helped me a whole lot. So, you might want to consider trying to get them interested in piano, even if they don’t play (piano) for the rest of their lives.

P.P.S. What the heck was that P.S.?! I just gave advice on how to raise a kid musically! Geez…

11

Talk about an interesting post! Good re sponses so far: allow me to add mine.

I believe the best way to get kids interested in music is to play lots of it–all the time–all kinds. If you play an instrument or two or three (like me) do so with them in the room. Let him strum the guitar while you finger the chords. Let her draw the bow across the strings while you play Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. Give all a whistle (I did).

My oldest sings; my middle child sings, plays viola and is learning fiddle/violing and whistle. My youngest (just 5) blows a whistle, dances and sings her heart out!

The oldest of six, I grew up with music. My parents told us we had to either play and instrument or participate in a sport through high school (to learn self-discipline, etc.). After that, it was up to us.

Violin, trombone, cello, viola, flute (and baskball were selected. Only the violinist (me) and the flutist continue.

BTW: my lids’ interests have run a wide gamut: ballet, gymnastics, music, art. They’re still figuring things out, but their exposure to the arts in all forms has improved them as people and made them much more well-rounded.

Hey, my 18-year-old actually appreciates Mozart! :slight_smile:

-Tom

12

Great question(s)! We have three children, 21, 18 and 16. Music has been a big part of their life. They all took a little piano, taught by my wife, as wee ones; and then took drum, oboe, and sax respectively upon entering jr. high. We noted that the band experience gave them a somewhat “safe” group to hang with during their jr/sen high days. All have opted out of playing instruments at this point in time, but they would each say that they are richer because of it. We even went through the “garage band” days when our oldest, the drummer, had his friends over to form a rock band. Pity our poor neighbors. But I wouldn’t trade for the memories of depressing lyrics, strong bass runs, and louder than loud cymbol crashes! Occasionally they would even ask to me to join in with a flute or whistle “harmony.” Music served as a great way for us to bond with our teens.

13

I think Tom “fiddling tenor” is right on the money. Smart lad, Tom. Must be something about that name…

Anyway, as yet I have no kids of my own, but I have around 280 of other people’s for several hours a day, so I’ll add these thoughts:

Kids learn by immitating. If you want them to love music, you must love music. If you want them to learn, you must learn. If you want them to develop a passion for singing or playing an instrument (or laughing, or serving others, or much of anything else worth doing), you must have the passion as well. No cheating, no faking, no other way about it.

If the parents are true music lovers and learners, early exposure is no problem. Kids should hear music, of all kinds, live and recorded, from the womb.

Encourage them to participate by singing, playing the beat on a drum (with or without the organ grinder suit :laughing: ), or even random tootling on a whistle. Kids LOOOOVE things that make sounds. As for lessons, compulsory practice sessions, and the like, it’s been my experience that most kids aren’t ready to “study” an instrument until around forth grade or so.

I would never, ever, EVER force a child to take up an instrument, especially at an early age. I’ve seen too many kids (myself included) become burned out after a year or two of compulsory piano lessons, and never play the thing again.

Better to wait until it’s their idea. If you have a musical home, it will probably happen sooner or later (my brother finally started learning to play the guitar when he was over thirty). And if they never get the desire, you’ll have saved yourself a whole lot of work and banging-of-heads-against-the-proverbial-brick-wall. Some people just don’t get it, no matter what you do. It takes all kinds.

Tom

14

When I was a child, my mother forced me to learn the piano. I hated it. The only thing that kept me going was my grandfather who was a professional jazz musician. He’d come over and put jazz rudiments to absolutely everything I was playing. He made music more enjoyable than I could ever imagine.

I’ve never forced my children into music. They saw me having fun with it, and decided to follow suit. So far they have kept up rather nicely all on there own.

Much to my surprise, I sat my son down and gave him a quick tutorial on how to read music and the fingerings on the penny whistle. He’s been figuring out The Minuet all on his own from that one lesson! It’s one of the few things he has stayed interested in for more than a few weeks besides star gazing.

My entire family is still musical, many of them going into the professional field. It’s always a pleasure to see the interest passed down!

My grandfather was not a religious man by any means except when it came to playing music; it was the only time he referred to God, saying it was the closest you would ever get to speaking to him/her, cause the feelings of music comes from the heart.