How about you dog people???

Poststructural Pub
1

Ok - all the cat people have been going on about how strange their pets are. So - let’s hear from all you dog owners!!!

We have two boxers, Buster and Wyley. Both are about 8 years old, both are rescues. Buster is brindle, and a little psycho. If he hadn’t been named already, we’d have called him “Tigger”. Wyley is fawn, much bigger then Buster, and REAL laid back. We would have named him “Eeyore”.
We’ve decided that they have one brain cell that they have shared custody of. I ask who has custody each morning so I know how to handle them for the day.
Buster “kills” toys - he shakes them like crazy. Wyley will watch him, sneak one, shake it a time or two, then lay down on it. He can’t be bothered.
Wyley is everybody’s buddy (and absolutely adores harpmaker!). Buster is a little scared of new people, but will warm up to you after a while (we think he was beaten before we got him).

I love 'em both - but they are SO dumb!!!

2

How about cat-dog people?
Things can get really silly. Here’s one game: Chessie the cat sits on the back step, doing her best to look feline and utterly chaseable for the dog’s benefit. Freddi, the terrier-shepherd hybrid says, “lemme out, lemme out–I need to run over that cat!”
So, you open the back door, and at the exact moment that Freddi leaps at Chessie, Chessie hops nimbly under the steps. Freddi lands on the ground wondering why she didn’t just run over a cat.

3

Back when I was still living at home (which was a long time ago..heh), my mom used to have this Weimaraner that loved to sniff those dried pepper flakes that you get with pizza. He would just jam his nose down onto them as hard as he could, and inhale deeply, his eyes getting all big and bug-eyed. It was hilarious!

4

We lost our beloved companion of 18 years this past July, when we were in England. We’re only now starting to think in terms of getting another dog (that’s the reason we’re going to be getting hard flooring, actually).

Cedar was a fun dog, with a real sense of humor (typical poodle!). He could actually articulate certain words (also not unusual with poodles), and it was hysterical to see the look on people’s faces when he’d walk up to them and beg for a bite of their sandwich by exclaiming “num num!”

He was also a tough guy, though. I remember once we left him in the kitchen of the family cabin when we went to church. Unexpected by us, my hubby’s cousin (and co-owner of the cabin) Ron arrived while we were gone. Not knowing there was a dog in there, he walked right into the kitchen. Cedar let out a snarl and went for him…all 13 pounds of my normally gentle dog turned into an attack-trained-killer-pit-poodle and latched on to Ron’s ankle! Cedar didn’t know Ron from Adam…he thought he was a burglar! Fortunately, Ron was wearing jeans and cowboy boots, and managed to extricate himself without much bodily harm to either himself or the dog. When we came back to the cabin, Ron was waiting outside. I went in and got Cedar, and he was all set to go after Ron again…he’d look at us, then glare at Ron and growl as if he were saying “that’s the one, you guys…that’s the burglar!” He did eventually make up to Ron, who fortunately was man enough to admire a tough little guard dog (even if the dog did have a froo froo hair cut!)

He was gentle as the day with children, however…especially disabled children. I often wished that therapy dogs had been more common when Cedar was young, because he would have been great at it. I remember one day when we were out walking, we encountered a young boy with Down Sydrome out walking with his mother. The little boy grabbed Cedar around the neck before the mom and I could react and hoisted him up in the air. It was a good 15 seconds before we could get him to let go, with poor Cedar’s eyes bulging out and his feet waving frantically. As soon as the child let go, however, Cedar calmly walked up and licked his face. Somehow he knew the boy had meant no harm.

Even when he was quite old and blind, he still was a feisty guy. He became the master of the slow-motion cat chase. Our cat Jonah, who was little more than a kitten at the time, loved to try to get Cedar to chase him. He’d tease and tease until Cedar, using his nose to locate exactly where the cat was, would get in his face and absolutely ROAR at him. The cat, of course, would run off, but Cedar would stalk him, nose swinging back and forth like radar. When he located the cat again, he’d pull the same thing…right up in the face and roar! I don’t know what poor Jonah’s going to do when we get a new puppy…he won’t know how to deal with a dog who can actually see him (not to mention run!).

Such a great dog…I still miss you, buddy :sniffle:

Redwolf

5

I had a black lab/shepherd mix that would eat anything. Once – and this is so darned cute – he ate an entire package of chicken breasts, including the styrofoam tray, the plastic wrap and the little sanitary napkin they put under the chicken breasts to soak up the extra juice.

A couple of days later, we found him out in the yard, straining at the stool. Turns out – and this is so darned cute, too – he was trying to pass that chicken wrapper. But he only got it part way out, so I had to put on rubber gloves and pull it the rest of the way out of his ass. And that darn dog – this is cute, as well – he made a noise kind of like a squeeze toy when I yanked it out.

And if that story isn’t cute enough, I’ll tell you about when he ate the four boxes of Russell’s Stover’s Assorted Creams. And about his fondness for Huggies.

6

My Aussie shepherd mix Chester is not dumb; he’s pretty smart, with the exception of his palate. He will eat anything, too; he’s like a shark with fur. That, combined with the speed and cunning of a master thief, make him a danger to himself. Not only will he eat any kind of human food he can get, even those you’d think too spicy or too bland (sour pickles, hot peppers, raw green beans…sauerkraut, iceberg lettuce, etc.); he eats just about anything, with a definite preference for plastics, paper, cloth, and tobacco products. He will eat an entire pack of cigarettes if he can get it; failing that, he will cheerfully devour butts out of an ashtray. He steals toilet paper rolls, takes the cardboard tube out of the center, eats that, chomps up the rest of the roll a little, and leaves it otherwise intact in the middle of the floor. I gave him one of those dog-play-frisbees; he scorned to catch it, but ate it, instead. I will spare you the disgusting details of how we discovered he had eaten an entire large zip-lock baggie; suffice it to say it was the same scenario gonzo just described. :wink:

7

We have four cats, but I’m a dog-person really. So I have a part-share in my friend’s dog. She lives three streets away. On Sundays, if I get a chance, I take it for a long walk. According to my friend, I am “Uncle Fred” to this dog. The dog’s name is Clara Bow. (The friend’s name is Josie.)
Mostly we go on a walk which goes through a field which is sometimes full of sheep. Last time she did a runner before I got the lead onto her, before we got into this field. And chased the sheep. Argh! Good job it’s not lambing season! Good job the dog came back (not soon enough!) !BLOODY good job the farmer didn’t see us! So this week we went up the NEXT hill. And we could see that the sheep had been moved into the next field.
The dog is only a year old, and they tell me this is the age when dogs get “the terrible twos”. She’s part boxer, and it’s not that she’s stupid, she just gets these moments when she finds it hard to concentrate. Like when she’s awake.
But the field we went up had some kind of wheat crop growing in it. Not yet fully grown, but long enough to tickle a dog’s tummy. So Clara Bow goes bounding around this field like she’s chasing hares, and it takes me a minute to work out that she’s enjoying the sensation of a tummy-tickle and a run at the same time. Very funny to watch.

8

My Bull Terrier lives to play with either his frisbee or one of his many knotted rope toys lying around the house. He is very serious about when it is time to play, and “no” is an unacceptable answer when ever he chooses play time.

It usually occurs any time I am seated at my computer (also my reedmaking workbench and practice area). He’ll come up to my leg, and with a rope in his mouth, nudge me with his wet nose. If I don’t respond, he’ll do it again, but harder. He won’t do it a third time, instead, all 65 pounds of him becomes airborne (still holding his rope or frisbee) and headed for that area between my lap and my keyboard. It can be a messy landing, especially if I have a cup of coffee or a bowl of soup in the way of his flight path.

It’s then I finally get the point, and after cleaning stuff up, I play with him. :smiley:

9

Bummer! It must sting to lose your stash like that.

10

Until 7 or 8 years ago I always had dogs. I had Jack Russell terriers, I had spaniels, I had various crossbreeds - Doberman/unidentified, Collie/Alsatian…

Dogs are so lovely. But they are stupid. They depend on you 136.4%. They trust you 232%.

Unless you have a heart of stone, cats are better.

Losing a cat will break your heart every time; but losing a dog will nearly kill you every time.

11

Stung him more … :laughing:

12

Ah, deeply felt and beautifully put, buddhu.

Which reminds me I’d meant to thank Redwolf for the story of Cedar, above; and to say…I’m sorry to hear that you lost him… after 18 years, so hard … the description of the dauntless blind cat-chasing brought tears to my eyes.

We give them our hearts to tear, don’t we.
:cry:

13

Oh Lord…dogs and what they will eat! When Cedar was a pup, we used to live not far from the beach in Pacific Grove. Every Saturday morning, I’d get up bright and early and take the dog for a walk. Lovely…except for the fact that every teenager in Monterey County had spent the night on the beach (and let’s just say that dogs are better at “spotting” certain objects than humans are). Having a tug of war with your dog who is determined to swallow a used condom is an exercise guaranteed to put you off beach walks for life!

Coins were a problem too. I’ll never forget the time he swallowed a penny he found on the floor. We called it the veterinary savings plan…we put in a penny and the vet took out $500.

He could have a sophisticated palate too, though. He refused to touch rice unless it was basmati! And he loved raw broccoli…he’d come running in as soon as I started to cut it up for stir fry and sit there drooling until I’d share.

Redwolf

14

Our Great Pyrenees, Samson, once ate an entire Nerf football in less than five minutes. We found little bits of blue foam in the yard for days as it slowly passed through his system. After that, the kid next door was much more careful about keeping his toys on his side of the fence.

15

Jack Russell Terriers are my favorite dog. My brother has a Jack Russell Terrier mix, and she is the smartest dog I’ve ever met, bar none. It’s eery how smart and expressive she is. However, one of my other brothers has an American Pit Bull Terrier who is as stupid as a rock. But he licks you until your face is red. It’s amazing how dogs can have such different personalities. Cats, in my opinion, are all hunch-backed, uptight heartless hermits.

16

I’ve a poodle. Smart as anything, and strong-willed as a cat.

17

It’s terrible to lose them after so many years, but none of us would ever trade a day of it, would we? The years of friendship are worth even the heartbreak. My biggest regret is that he left when we were gone. He had been doing just fine (a bit senile and arthritic, but no sign that things were coming to an end), but evidently a week after we left, he started having seizures and the vet found he was in heart failure. I’m very glad that we knew we might be hard to reach and made provisions for something like that, and I’m more thankful than I can ever say that our faithful petsitter, who he loved, stayed with him to the end, but I can never quite forgive myself for not being there.

I’m about ready for another dog, I think…once your hands have held a leash, they’re never content to be empty.

Redwolf

18

dogs and their dietary habits…

Had a boxer when Nate was born - BIG boxer (over 85lbs) named Porky. If I had named him, it would have been Hoover. He ate skeleton keys - would just walk up to the door and “slurp”, down they’d go. Ate the ex’s tie clasp 3 times (we figured out where the metal things were going by that time, and would hose down the yard…). Ate an entire cassette, case and all - all I found was one little white wheel.
But he was great with Nate - would let Nate grab onto his collar and pull the kid around in his walker, and Nate basically learned to walk holding onto the dog.

Got a dalmation next. Stubborn as all get out. Could only wag his tail in a circle, like a propeller. And ate green beans and tomatos off the plants in the garden. AND a box of 64 crayons - left the sharpener. Oh - and angelfood cake - he LOVED angelfood cake. I’d have to hide it in the microwave or he’d eat it - wrapping and all.

So far, neither Buster or Wyley have eaten too much in the way of weird, but you better pay attention to them when it’s 3:30 and time to eat!! If you don’t, they’ll come over and start whapping you on the leg, and “arguing” with you!!

19

Yes my Bully has odd eating habits. He like rocks, bugs, grass, cat poop and my Arundo Donax… reed cane. He can never get enough of it. :laughing:

20

Maybe he suffers from pica. Have you taken him to a dog psychiatrist?