Maybe he means melodeon?
I dunno about harpoons, but I have a 12-gauge that’s pretty chromatic (crossbow’s pentatonic tho).
Harp
→ dynamic range (ability to play soft/loud).
Harp
→ melody + backing in 1 instrument
Harp
(actually I’m curious. How do you control dynamics on a box?)
Of course, accordions actually make audible noise. That is one advantage. Just one tho mind you.
Without accordians we wouldn’t have Zydeco!!! Having attended parties where zydeco was being played I can say it ROCKS.
I might add that DJM has a history of disliking anything non-Irish. 
And he doesn’t like free reed instruments of any type. Right?
I’m not big on man-boobs, either. 
djm
(actually I’m curious. How do you control dynamics on a box?)
It’s all in the amount of pressure/force you use on the bellows. Most accordions have a pretty huge dynamic range.
Sigh. I never liked the way they smell.
They all seem to have that . . . little . . . smell . . . about them.
I’ve been told my grandfather was a wizard with an accordian. Luckily, I dodged the bullet having to listen to him. (God rest him)
Unfortunatly, my great-grandmother slipped a polka record into some records she gave my brother and I many moons ago, and my brother has turned into a lover of accordian music. 
I can understand people not liking accordians, and I can understand people liking accordian music. What I don’t understand is people that don’t/do like accordian trying to convince someone in the other camp to change their minds. I mean, just because I don’t like okra doesn’t mean I’ll try to dissuade other folks from eating it.
As for accordians: they have such versatility. In the hands of a dedicated musician they can sound good, even great. In the hands of a hack they can sound positively dreadful. Much like the pipes in that regard.
Modern times, man, modern times. Why can’t they focus on something, like the accordion player, for more than a millisecond ? It was interesting—in a way .
Piano, piano, piano 
I can understand people not liking accordians, and I can understand people liking accordian music. What I don’t understand is people that don’t/do like accordian trying to convince someone in the other camp to change their minds. I mean, just because I don’t like okra doesn’t mean I’ll try to dissuade other folks from eating it.
Well, that’s the difference, isn’t it? There’s a huge difference between “I don’t like okra” and “all okra is horrible and anyone who likes it must be a diseased, brain-addled mutant.” A lot of people who don’t like the accordion tend to voice their dislike in the latter way. Which of course makes me want to say, no, actually the accordion is an incredibly cool and versatile and expressive instrument; just sit down for a minute and listen to this, and this, and this.
If you think you don’t like the sound of accordions, maybe you haven’t heard enough accordion music. I say this speaking as a former box-hater myself.
I see your point.