The last few days around here, the air has been filled with death and dying or bittern feuds or negativity of one type or another. Even though this is “only” an Internet forum, I can feel it. I suspect I am not alone.
So…
Everybody name three things that make you happy.* I’ll go first:
1). Newborn puppies, the little tiny ones with their eyes still closed
2). When people pronounce the “h” in “historic”
3). harp music
*amar need not participate, lest this thread becomes obscene and gets locked
1.All the stuff that is available to learn.
2.My cat’s gray fur.
3.objects, textures, colors.
(tangentially, it fascinates me how this geographically scattered, type-based, means of conversing can carry and convey the same friendliness, tensions, emotions both + and -, that occur when humans are situated in the same literal room.)
Writing a new song.
1b) Finding a “new” melody on the whistle.
1c) Performing for an audience and “hitting it out of the ballpark.”
Finding that “perfect” gift for that hard to shop for friend or relative.
2b) Finding a bargain for something that I really need or have wanted for a long time.
Time with friends.
3b) Unexpected time with friends.
Cran, this is a great topic. In the last several months: my boss’s daughter has been diagnosed with leukemia, my best friend and his wife miscarried at six months, and a co-worker’s husband died suddenly (as a result of a leg injury).
I WANT one of those really soft gray cats!!! Their fur is SOOOO cool.
My top three:
best family I can imagine – wife, 3 YO daughter, parents, brother and sisters
flute lessons with one of the best players and teachers in the world
I have been birdwatchin’ lately. I go out everyday at lunch break where I work. Seeing pairs of Western Bluebirds lifted my heart. Their blue is shimmering. Today I saw a Cedar Waxwings right by my house. I had only seen em in books. It’s also an excuse to be outdoors and we are having a booming spring this year. Yesterday, while out, I experienced hundreds of painted lady butterflies flying right by me (we are having a record year of them, it was even in the papers and yesterday was the peak of their fly-by in this area).
Both of my boys are doing well. The older one has made it to 15 without being a sullen, misunderstood teenager and he just got his Bomb Factory Flowboard (custom skateboard) and is completely stoked (a birthday present backordered from Feb 4).. The younger one takes great delight in little things. On a walk today, we saw a yellow-bellied racer (a snake) and he is still talkin’ about it. That kid always sees the bright side of things and I thank God that he has the gift that I do not.
I am really enjoying my Eb Burke that I bought at the Tionol. It’s a nimble little tooter and the ornaments are soundin’ good. I have the good but frustrating feeling that Irish music offers so many wonderful tunes to learn and play that I hunger for more time for it. And the bottom line about happiness is, I guess, is that I am never bored.
Well, because it’s supposed to be there. It also makes me happy when people use ‘a’ as an indefinate article with the adjective “historic”, instead of “an”.
Focus on being kind to other people and see what happens to yourself. I have to admit I’ve quoted the “No good deed goes unpunished” saying from time to time, but recent events have made me consider more strongly that maintaining a compassionalte outward focus will bring happiness more assuredly than anything else. First, it will improve your relationships and interactions with other people and it makes your life easier as a consequence.
On a weirder, more karmic note, I’ve heard that ‘what goes around comes around.’ It’s always sounded nice. Lately, it’s seemed more like it might be real. I’ve been focusing on doing the right thing and being happy about it. Lately, good fortune has been falling into my lap. For one, I just got a position at work that gives me Mondays off for a 3 day weekend every week. Nothing could be more desireable to me. Plus the job itself fell into my lap and suits me perfectly.
I do this every day except when I’m too tired or when people go out of their way to be nasty to me. It takes no more physical energy to be nice, and much less psychic energy.
Dennis Prager’s ten-year quest led him to the conclusion that gratitude is the #1 link to happiness. For the vast majority of Americans, I would agree with that.
It is important to distinguish between pleasure and happiness. Eating an entire cheese cake may give me short term pleasure, but will not lead to any lasting happiness. In fact, the stomach ache, and weight gain will result in a negative. Same for watching TV all day or all night, it gives stimulation and mind-numbing pleasure, but no happiness at the end of the road.
Being kind is fine and admirable, but I personally do not believe there is a direct correlation to happiness. I speak from personal experience–I have been a kind person for most of my life and I have a very shaky record regarding happiness. Some people are kind because they need to please, because they are insecure. In some ways, it is a frightening way to live, always wearing a mask of kindness. Cultured, polite and classy are another kettle of fish, but again while admirable, I don’t believe there is a connection to happiness.
