After seeing the haiku in the newsletter
I’m wondering, what are the rules for writing them, what pattern are you supposed to follow. (my only experience with them was when they had the “emperor’s poems” segment on kids in the hall)
Jeff
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[ This Message was edited by: jeffmiester on 2003-01-21 17:32 ]
My son just learned it this morning in his homeschool (3rd grade).
It’s five beats in the first line, seven in the second, five in the third. Here is his first attempt at a haiku:
Rain-sprinkled colors
Dripping in the winter sky
Drumming on the ground
K
There are different rules for other forms of haiku, but this is the most common:
17 syllables in three lines, divided thusly:
5
7
5
eg.
five syllables here
then you put seven more here
then five more right here
(lame, I know)
There are actually conventions and expectations as to content and flow, but I think that they would be hard to follow doing whistle haiku. Just get the syllables right.
Ooo. I like the word ‘beats’ better than syllables. 17 beats. 5-7-5.
One common idea in haiku is to juxtapose two dissimilar things in a way they say something about each other. It’s very metaphorical.
I always understood it as being syllables too, but my son’s curriculum referred to it as beats. I went ahead with beats…because he’s only 7. He knows what syllables are, but beats are possibly easier for him in this case.
K
[ This Message was edited by: Kim in Tulsa on 2003-01-21 17:59 ]
domo arigatu
As taught in schools, haiku is in the form of 3 lines with 5, 7, and 5 syllables. It’s a bit more complicated than that but, for this kind of thing, that works. Typically, you avoid articles of speech, punctuation and rhyme. However, a lot of Internet haiku (such as the legendary Spam haiku) is sort of pseudo-haiku or parody of haiku and, for the most part, 3 lines of 5,7,5 syllables is the only rule. And, I think it is important to note that we really are talking about syllables here and not beats.
Although, really, I’ve already said too much.
Dale
On 2003-01-21 18:15, DaleWisely wrote:
I think it is important to note that we really are talking about syllables here and not beats.
It was my understanding the Haiku were not done so much by syllable but as by time…or beat. An interesting article discusses it here:
http://web.wanadoo.be/tempslibres/en/theo/mode04.html
And here,in](http://www.time.com/time/europe/magazine/2000/0724/essay.html">here</a>,in) TIME Magazine Europe, I found an article where the head of the World Haiku Club is featured:
A man who should know whether the rules need revising is Susumu Takiguchi, a Japanese who has lived three decades in England, and fashions haiku in his own and adopted languages. Takiguchi is chairman of the World Haiku Club and the man behind next month's international festival. He says part of the problem is that the 17-syllable rule is based on a false premise. The haiku's 17 Japanese "beats," as he prefers to call them, don't translate into 17 English syllables, so there's nothing sacred about the number.
A Google search brought many examples of the word "beats" used when describing haiku poetry, sometimes in connection with syllables. I get the impression that the Japanese have a more rythmic way of writing haiku (using beats) and perhaps we just can't do it that way with our English syllables?
Anyway, I figure the word “beat” is ok to use when teaching how to write a haiku, especially to primary aged children.
Since my whistle haiku was overlooked for the newsletter, I’ll post it here (harrumph!):
whistling in my room
three-year-old arrives on scene
bye-bye music stand
practice makes perfect
the high C sharp is my goal
husband averts eyes
go to bed honey
brush your teeth and go to bed
whistle calls my name
a child’s tune played well?
I must convert the natives
or whistle will burn!
my sax is silent
wanton whistle infects me
its pow’r I submit
a slow air I play
daughter dancing to my song
a duet blossoms
Robin
Well, Dale, great newsletter, as always, however, I think you forgot to include my number one favorite C&F haiku… ( with apologies to the author, I didn’t write down your name…)
Tales of woe and spite
Whistles, cats and brother Mike
They don’t understand.
Sweet sound of music
Dogs howl, birds fly, mice cringe.
Damn cats bury whistle.
Where is my whistle?
What’s that in the litterbox?
Hmmmm, oh no, damn cats!
Disinfect fipple.
Not worried about spittle.
I just can’t do it.
Give this one away.
Merry Christmas, brother Mike!
A new tinwhistle!
ha ha ha!! Good one!
And b/c mine never made it into the Tinwhistle Haiku… here they are for anyone who cares to read:
The Lone Whistle
The winter moonlight
glistens on the chilly frost.
Haunting tunes are played.
Movement in the trees;
feet thudding on the frozen ground.
A rhythm begins.
Here are a couple which don’t exactly follow the “Haiku” rules…
O! How I love the
sweet sound which is the singing
voice of thy Elven
whistle.
Rainy Day
Outside it’s dreary
Inside I play my whistles,
Delighting in their
Song.
Well done, Elf.
On the basis of my very limited knowledge (gleaned on two very short work-related trips to the land of the rising sun), you seem to have got some of the spirit of the haiku rather than the mere metre.
I wonder would the “beats vs. syllables” thing be due to the fact that Japanese final consonants always seem to have at least a vestigial vowel attached (or am I talking BS?).
Thank you Roger. 
As for the Japanese language… I don’t know squat. lol.
Mine did:-) I tried to be a little risque with mine. I’d like to think it worked.