It was 2:38 in the afternoon, here in Green Country, when I received a call on the telephone. It was from Amar. Now it’s unusual that I should get a call from Switzerland, but I knew that rates were high enough that it must be something important.
When I got off the phone I headed out to Eufaula, to the Tastee Freez, where I ordered a twist ice cream cone and a diet cola. I regretted the diet cola, as it turned out to be made with artificial sweetener, which I can’t stand, but Amar had sounded so urgent.
I then headed back home, and logged onto Chiff &Fipple, where I noticed that Kim in Tulsa was being noticeably silent. In fact, when I went to the members list, and sorted it by number of posts, she was actually at the bottom of the page! Something must be wrong. Had Lord of the Rings gone out of fashion? Did Walt Disney Productions catch up to her for posting their intellectual property, It’s a Small World, After All on the OK Whistlers Yahoo Group?
Just as Amar had been concerned earlier about the problems, I was now concerned about Kim in Tulsa.
So I went into the Frequent Posters’ Lounge, and checked the log. It seems that Kim in Tulsa had never even picked up her key from The Weekenders.
So I ran a Google search and found that Arby’s actually had a larger market share than Tastee Freez, but this still didn’t explain why Amar and Kim in Tulsa were worrious.
My theory was that Kim in Tulsa had abandoned the tinwhistle altogether for the sweet, sweet, tones of the rec***er.
Dale was leading a discussion group on the soon-to-be bestseller, The Librarian Conspiracy, at the Sertoma hall. I was to be the special guest, that night, so I had to leave my concerns, and go to the group meeting.
When I got to the meeting, I forgot what I was doing, and I stood up and said, “My name is Walden, and I am a saltoholic,” which was very odd, considering I didn’t even have a problem with saltohol.
After the meeting, Dale told me of his plans to make Corinthia the campaign manager for the C&F gubernatorial campaign. After all, it’s not just anybody who can master the whistle to the point of fooling people into thinking they are a professional, in just two years of practice. I agreed wholeheartedly, and began to wonder if Bloomfield had nothing left to sell.
When I called Bloomfield’s phone number I got, not a ring, not a busy signal, but a message that said, in a rather impertinent tone, “That number is busy. Would you like to use auto redial?” I hung up.
So, I began to wonder, when did Jim Stone replace Loren and Avanutria as the number one poster? And whatever became of Martin Milner after Australia?
