Bill gets a Kniggethood

Poststructural Pub
1

“The king of computer software Bill Gates is to receive an honorary knighthood from the Queen for his contribution to enterprise in the UK.”

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/3428673.stm

HMG also gave one to Robert Mugabe in 1994.

Enterprise user GaryKelly said “I think it’s wonderful news. There are 38000 users on our enterprise network. We each get about 5 security and bug-fix patches to our OS a week, and all of them require forced reboots. It just goes to show how much Bill Gates KBE cares about his customers and his products. From what I heard, that Linux thingy only released one security update last year…I mean, how cr*p is that?”

2

With Mick Jagger’s recent knnnigggethhhhood, this makes the (pants) pair of the year!

Oh-là-là, stoopidous knnnigggets and zeir sssilly kkkkwween! Should aïe taunt more? :laughing:

3

Bah! Oo eez dis foolish Billius knnnigget-fellow? Ah suspect ee sssmells of elderberries, and ah faht in his jeneral direkshun!

4

And if that doesn’t work, I suggest a mass email campaign…we all say


NEE

5

Shh! We are now the Knights Who Say ‘Ecky- ecky- ecky- ecky- pikang- zoop- boing- goodem- zoo- owli- zhiv’ !

6

You big bullies are fiends all the same, for us proud Sheevalliers (kinda French knniggethood) of
Shrubbery fiends forever!

Beside, you don’t exist anymore, pal.
You instantly skyrocketed over the wickets just as an ordinary fetchez-la-vache’s (woosh* moooh ***crash@@@) as soon as you revealed your identity.
See http://chiffboard.mati.ca/viewtopic.php?t=17170&start=109 for an in-depth explanation of this ballistic mishap.

7

My first thought when I read this news was “wait till Zub hears about this Knigggghhhhet” …

I try not to think too hard about the British monarchy and their doins’ but this one stumps me completely. I knew that the McCartney one was about all the business he brought to UK but he was at least born there, fercrynoutloud.

Guess Bill will have some kinda ribbon to wear over his beat-up Members Only windbreaker.

8

LOL, Weeks, and re-LOL !

Funny thing, if Billy-boy wanted to become a knnigget, he of anyone could afford paying to become a Malta Knnigget, which has a bit more class than being knniggeted into the company of rock-stars, or soccer and rugby players…
Or maybe one has to be a Catholic for them Maltesers?

9

Upon further reflection, wasn’t Freddy Laker the first big business knigggghettt? I sorta remember thinking along the same lines about this Gates business at the time, but once again, he was British.

Were there big business kniigggets before him? I mean, of the modern age, because I know that Drake was probly knigghhettED for privateering or something… Is there a Sir Cadbury??? Or Sir Walls???

grumble… Royal Order of smudged-lens-big-plastic-frame whiny nylon-clad pasty-faced TexasInstrument toting mansion-building Apple-Hating KNIGGGGGHHHETTTS!

(That’s okay, I hate Jobs too, especially his black turtleneck; don’t even get me started).

10

I think that maybe Bill ‘Master of the virtual Universe’ Gates should be giving an award to our Queen,rather than the other way round!

11

Honours? A redundant relic from our imperialist past.

The Rasta poet Benjamin Zephaniah had it right with his response when he was offered an OBE.

“Me? I thought, OBE me? Up yours, I thought.”

Hmm… imperialist… actually a kniggethood is probably quite appropriate for Bill Geek.

*rse, as father Jack might say.

12

Oh. Um, l-- look, i-- i-- if we built this large wooden badger–

13

A badger Gary??!!

Surley now is the time for the Holy Handgrenade of Antioch


Stu H

14

:cry: I keep forgetting what shall be the number I shalt count!

edited to add: that’s probably why my jigs sound so bad!

15

Fine stuff Gary, and when you’ve finished, just drop it by our back garden and hopefully it’ll scare away all the real ones. Goody goody, Gary’s going to build me a scarebadger :smiley:

trisha

16

'Tis but a crash!!
A crash?! Your datas gone!
No it isn’t.
LOOK!
It’s only a reboot.
A ReBOOT?!
C’mon ye PANSY! Reformat blindly and accept your fate like everyone else in the Micro$oft universe!!

Get Linux. Never crash or cry (or pay out the nose for your OS or updates) again. :smiley:

17

Is Lizzie getting senile, I wonder?

It seems knighthood is meaningless today, sort of like the value of PHD in art history, which ruins the good name of doctor.

Never will I say sir Billy.

Beware, the Penguin is coming…

18

Don’t tell me he’s getting knighted too? What’s next, “Sir Riddler?”

19

That’s the wrong penguin. I was referring to Tux, the Linux penguin mascot.

Look over your sholder, Bill, it’s the dreaded Penguin.

I wish I could find the image I wanted to post, but this will have to do.

20

YES, Tux is coming, faster and faster he is taking over not only the workplace but the home user environment as well!!! Thank the powers that be for Linux stability, flexibility, and endless tinkerage :smiley: